


Beauty is the Beast

by PoshelNahuy



Category: The Outer Worlds (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Shameless Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-01-23 10:08:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 26,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21318433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoshelNahuy/pseuds/PoshelNahuy
Summary: Vicar Max and the Captain don't get along. Not yet at least.
Relationships: Vicar Max/ M!Captain
Comments: 28
Kudos: 141





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thankyou ahead of time if y'all end up enjoying this. I just wanted to do it for fun, so it's far from perfect, but I tried my best to make it entertaining. As a side note, I love to add music to my fics so I'll just drop the links for each relevant chapter if anyone is interested. 
> 
> "I Kto ego znaet" ("Good morning, crew!")  
https://youtu.be/7F2NaFFY8ac
> 
> "Love is a B*tch - Two Feet" (For when the 'mood is set')  
https://youtu.be/k_Pik0YleJQ

From the moment Vicar Maxmillian Desoto stepped foot on the Unreliable he found himself at odds with the excessively strong personalities of the crew, particularly the Captain. Colimgar “Hawthorne” Bogomolov was a pernicious hard-ass with a quick-temper and a sharp tongue, which should have meant he and Max would get along famously, but much of the time his rigid ire was turned on Max himself. He was surprised to learn offhandedly that the Captain’s last name literally translated to ‘pious one’ as the man didn’t seem to have a religious bone in his body. Within moments of their introduction Colimgar called him an ‘ass’ outright and following that day Max could either expect Col to deride his beliefs or feign deafness to get his point across. 

Despite that, amongst other complaints, the Vicar stayed because Colimgar was willing to cooperate with him on his personal quest. He didn’t understand why a man with such distaste for him would lift a finger to help, and maybe he never would, but for now he simply tried to stay out of the Captain’s way and coped with the rest. 

Today it seemed unavoidable. Col and Felix had been engaged in a rather loud back and forth for a while now, as Max attempted to listen to the ongoing Toss-ball match, and it was becoming apparent that no one else was going to step in to mediate. The Vicar rubbed his throbbing temples in a vain attempt to banish the growing headache before he called it a lost cause and rose from his table so angrily his chair tipped over. His blood reached its boiling point well before he managed to even reach the verbal scuffle but it fizzled when a powerful odor floored him. Max reflexively clamped a hand over his nose and stared in awe at the four wooly cows carelessly grazing in the cargo bay.

“Fucking Monarch, Felix?” Col paced to and fro menacingly with long strides in front of the clearly ashamed young man, “We need repairs, fuel, food. The Unreliable is going to be laid up on the Groundbreaker for at least a week and you THOUGHT we should haul these shitting machines to MONARCH? That’s the complete opposite fucking direction.” 

Felix avoided eye contact and instead stared at his feet, “The guy said there was good bits in the job.”

“The guy said?!” Col roared, planting his feet firmly to tower over Felix. Max was waiting for the day the kid got sick of being yelled at like that and just punched Col right in his handsome chiseled jaw. He checked to see if said part of Colimgar was flexing like it usually did when he was angrily grinding his teeth. Indeed, it was. 

The Captain shoved a stiff finger into the young man’s chest as he growled, “You. Take. Care. Of. This. They’re your responsibility now until we can dump them somewhere.” He turned on a sharp heel and stomped away, passing Max without so much as a sidelong glance. The two heard the Captain’s Quarters door slide shut and the momentary silence that followed was tense. 

“Man, I fucked up again,” Felix let his stiffened limbs relax. It felt like getting yelled at by a disappointed father, or rather what he imagined what it would feel like. Col was the nearest thing to a father he’d had in years. Felix glanced at Max and scowled, “Don’t say a word, git.” 

Max was mildly pleased that he got to watch, but more so relieved he didn’t have to step in. If Max were to be honest with himself, he admired Colimgar for keeping such a rag tag group in line despite how hard he was on them sometimes. Tough love had certain benefits. 

He may have stayed to watch Felix shovel shit, but decided better on it. His presence was no longer needed, and the smell was starting to get past his fingers. Max headed back up to his cabin to hopefully catch the final inning of the match, but he stopped at Col’s door out of curiosity. He leaned in close, but could hear nothing from the other side.

\---

The next morning the Captain had yet again woken the entire ship over the intercoms with music from some ancientRussian album. Vicar Max had no idea where Colimgar had gotten his hands on a copy, as it had to have been recorded well over two hundred years ago, but he had long ago given up trying to understand the inner machinations of the Captain and it was filed away under ‘unanswered peculiarities’. This happened so often Max was sure the particular song playing was supposedly called ‘I kto ego znaet’ but he didn’t know what any of the words meant. Colimgar insisted that they weren’t important and that he and the crew should just enjoy the tune. 

He was just vaguely aware of his surroundings as he hadn’t slept well the past few nights and being woken so abruptly was making it difficult to be completely cognizant at the unholy hour Colimgar roused the crew. Five in the morning, everyday, on the dot. Col liked his routines. 

Max shuffled out of his cabin, eyes drifting over the room until they fell upon the full coffee pot. At least Colimgar wasn’t so Law-forsaken to tear them from sleep without giving something in return. The smell of eggs and bacon finally hit his nostrils as he took his cup of ‘black gold’ and sat at the table so he could better stare at nothing in particular until his brain caught up to his body. 

As usual, he had arrived first, and for the too brief moments between now and when the others would come shambling into the kitchen he had a chance to watch Colimgar move unfettered. Today, he looked ready to ritualistically deep clean the ship again. His baggy , stained, overalls barely concealed the firm, muscular frame of his body. Particularly in the back. Max often found himself staring perhaps a little too long when he was in a sleep-deprived state, but he hadn’t been caught yet. Colimgar carried on and paid him little mind. 

“Good mornin,” Parvati was heavy lidded and yawning loudly when she arrived and plopped ungainly in her spot at the table. She gave Max a goofy smile, “How’d you sleep, Vicar?” 

Max paused for a long moment before he raised his brows and gave her an expression that said, “What do you think?” Parvati chuckled a bit at him and turned to Colimgar to say, “Good morning, Captain.” 

“Morning, Miss Holcomb. You ready for today?” Colimgar balanced four plates, two for each arm, and set them down. 

Parvati smiled at her plate before doing a triple take at Colimgar, “W-What? Oh, Law. Is that today?” 

Max tuned out the second his food was laid out before him. Just like every morning Colimgar had remembered how he liked his eggs. Over easy. Surely, he thought for the hundredth time, that meant he didn’t hate Max entirely. 

Next to show up were Felix and Ellie, both still half asleep and nearly leaning on each other for support. They wordlessly seated themselves and started digging in. 

“Where’s Nyoka?” Parvati’s words were garbled by a mouth full of food. She ate like this was her last meal. 

“Probably still drunk,” Colimgar said flatly with a lit cigarette dangling from his lip. He gathered a fifth plate, a tall cup of cold water, and a bottle of caffeine pills before calmly proceeding to bring Nyoka her breakfast. He came back moments later, empty handed and impassive to the daily routine. 

“Preacher, Miss Holcomb and I will be down yonder doing business with Miss Tennyson. I’ll be back in maybe half the time it takes you to style your hair and when I do I’d like you to help absterge the Unreliables cargo bay of bovine shit,” He poured himself a cup of coffee and continued before Max could fully process the sentence, “It’s time you pulled your weight.” 

The entire table glanced back and forth between the two of them as the peaceful silence over breakfast suddenly shifted into a palpable moment of tension. No one dared to make a sound except of course Max. 

“Pull MY weight? What the fuck-” He didn’t care in the moment what his fellow crew members might hear next. 

“Watch your mouth, preacher. You just so happened to be the only other one on board when Felix took a job on my behalf,” Colimgar said dryly, folding his arms over his chest. 

“Are you actually fucking accusing me of colluding with that ….kid. You have got to be fucking kidding me,” He was perched on the edge of his seat and white knuckled as he barely contained his temper. Last time he made the mistake of openly calling Felix stronger names he was on the cusp of a serious ass-kicking. 

“Not saying you helped. That’s the point,” Colimgar looked at Max with cold fury, teeth grinding and jaw set, almost daring Max to hit him, “Not even so much as a ‘No Felix, don’t’ from you. I was told you simply let it happen.” 

Max had more to say, but he found himself temporarily unable to speak. Colimgar unfolded his arms and tamped his cigarette out, “That’s what I thought. I’m of half a mind to also have you help make proper temporary pens for the beasts since you wanna act like an ungrateful ass, but I’m feeling generous today.” He finished off his cup of coffee in one gulp and turned his attention to the rest of his flabbergasted crew, “Miss Holcomb, best be on our way, we don’t wanna be late.” 

Parvati rapidly blinked and gave the Vicar a sympathetic look before she got in her last bites and got up from the table so quickly she nearly knocked it over, “Sorry, sorry! Uh...I’ll meet you on the deck Captain, just gotta freshen up!” She zoomed out of the kitchen towards the bathroom. 

Colimgar patted Felix on the shoulder with an affable manner, “You too Mr. Millstone. We oughta get the livestock enough grain to last til Monarch. I trust you can handle that?”

“Yes sir! Right away, Captain.” Felix beamed, the corners of his mouth stretching from ear to ear, and he too left the table with Colimgar close behind. 

There was then a stagnant pause, one that Max prayed Ellie wouldn’t attempt to fill with her comments, but he knew better. “Well shit, Vicky. You ever get torn a new one like that before?”

Max rolled his eyes and refused to answer Ellie, instead choosing to take his breakfast into his cabin and lock the door. At least until the Captain got back he could be alone here with his wretched thoughts. That was, until S.A.M. barged in for an impromptu cleaning session. 

\---

Max found himself once again in the cargo bay, this time rolling up the sleeves of his button up shirt with a bitter scowl. He glanced to his vestments that were neatly folded and strategically placed high on a crate to prevent them from getting soiled and sighed. 

“What’s the matter, preacher, never done a hard days work in your life?” Colimgar said as he finished hauling in the last tightly packed bail of hay and carelessly tossed it into the corner with the others. 

Max bit his tongue, seeing the bait for what it was, and he picked up his shovel. He imagined very briefly swinging it high over his head and bringing it down on the back of the Captain’s pretty head, but quickly banished the thought. “I don’t see how that’s any of your business. When I signed up with you in Edgewater I expected you needed spiritual guidance or a steady gun hand. Perhaps even a competent person capable of cracking computer systems. Not this.” He gestured to the steaming mess. 

“Fair enough,” Colimgar levelled the Vicar with his gaze. Not even attempting subtlety as his eyes dragged up and down like a hungry wolf looks at a steak. Max was a bit taken aback by the probing leer, feeling almost like the Captain was undressing him with his eyes, but he told himself that wasn’t the case. The Captain live a detached lifestyle. No lovers, just one night stands. Besides, the Vicar hardly considered himself the Captain’s type. At least, that’s what he reminded himself. He wasn’t entirely certain sometimes.

“Those the only shoes you got?” Colimgar’s scrutiny landed on Max’s feet.

“No,” He looked down, quickly searching for some obvious flaw but found nothing, “I have five more like this. They’re nicer than anything you could find just lying around.” Max made reference to the time he witnessed Colimgar pulling the boots off of a dead Marauder as if they had been sitting on a shelf in a boutique. 

“Good for you,” The sarcasm dripped from Colimgar’s tongue like acid, “They ain’t working shoes.” He waited, hoping Max would get the hint and go put on something more suited to shoveling shit, but Max just gave him an irritated glare. The Captain grinded his teeth a little, eyes closed as he counted to five, and he fell back on plan ‘b’. “Come on. I got a pair might fit you.” 

Max thought better on the insult he had prepared to fire and bit his tongue. Intrigue took precedence over his desire to make a snide comment about the Captains taste in fashion. He followed behind, keeping a reasonable distance between him and Colimgar, as they climbed up the stairs towards the Captain’s quarters. It dawned on Max the moment before the door unlocked that he had never seen inside, and he certainly never expected to be invited in. The first thing he noticed was the temperature, warm but not sweltering and perfect for terraforming. Next was the vivid green of plants growing over nearly every inch of the compact room. Max hardly noticed the door behind him shut and lock again as he observed each one. 

“Captain, I had no idea you carried on such a delicate hobby,” He marveled at the blooming, deep purple flower of one in particular, “I’ve never seen anything like these before.” 

“Just a piece of home,” Col had his back turned, squatting over a pile of clothes, “That little lady is Atropa Belladonna. Very poisonous, but if you have the know how it’s a great muscle relaxer.”

Max reflexively took a step back away from the flora, as if it might suddenly reach out and snap at him, “Are they all poisonous?” 

Colimgar had found what he was looking for by the time Max finished asking and turned to give him a rare smile, “Naw. Some are downright cuddly, like me.” He shoved not just boots, but a change of clothes into Max’s arms. “There, that’ll do you. Don’t wanna muss up your fine duds. Go on, put em on.” 

Max took a calculated look at Col, trying to surmise some underlying thread of a prank. He was unsure of what the Captain was implying by giving him an entire outfit, if he was implying anything at all. “Right now?”

“No need for modesty on my account, preacher. You’ve seen me in nothing but my unders before,” Colimgar let himself plop onto his bunk with a heavy ‘whumpf’ and he smirked deviously at the Vicar, “Unless you’re feeling shy.” 

Any other person and the Vicar might have hauled them over hot coals, daring him to undress and humiliate himself like that, but Colimgar had a way about him. He had heard of quick silver tongues before, but had never been faced with one like the Captain. Max was keenly aware this was a challenge, and he wasn’t about to give Colimgar the satisfaction of backing down. 

He was calm at first, laying the bundle on the chair before he began to undress with deliberation. Max spared quick glances at Colimgar, trying to gage the mood, but even as he slipped out of his shirt all he got in response was an impassable expression. 

Colimgar didn’t so much as twitch and instead followed Max’s hands with his eyes. Max felt himself lose a bit of composure as he reached for his belt, about a thousand possibilities racing through his mind, and he tried to reign his confusing thoughts. It did nothing to prevent him from envisioning the Captain pinning him to the table and having his way with Max, but the window of opportunity soon came and went like a fleeting heartbeat. 

He finished fastening the lace on the borrowed boots and found with surprising disappointment that Colimgar had remained seated the entire time. As his heart settled and his wits came back to him, he finally caught the whiff of Col’s distinct body odor rise from the clothing and he almost habitually wrinkled his nose and uttered a disgusted groan. 

Colimgar laughed with pride, “Don’t let the smell bother you too much, preacher. You’ll prefer it soon enough.” 

\---

Max didn’t have the gumption to say it aloud, but he was actually beginning to enjoy the musk that hung on Col’s clothes. It made him feel something he couldn’t put into words, at least not yet. 

The Captain had honored his promise and let Max go after the cleaning was done, but even the banging of hammers on wood and whirr of power-tools couldn’t yank Max out of his thoughts. Four days later he was sure he was still over-thinking things. His opinion of the Captain had become more complicated in one frustratingly mundane day and now he found himself trying to piece together why he couldn’t get Col off his mind. Max simultaneously felt shame for how aroused he could get just thinking about the way Col watched him undress and indignant that he even felt that shame. 

It took a modicum of willpower just to keep from burying his nose in Col’s shirt and inhale and damn near impossible to keep himself from mindlessly rutting into his hand like some horny teenager. He was somewhere in between wanting to throttle the Captain and wanting to fuck his brains out. Sometimes both. 

Luckily for him, no one else knew what was occupying his thoughts and the Captain had scarcely been aboard the Unreliable long enough to bring the issue to its head. Colimgar was probably off somewhere breaking even more rules which left Max enough time to compose a well thought out plan of attack. 

Max was in the middle of rehearsing in his head when he overheard A.D.A greet the Captain with a cheerful, “Captain Hawthorne, I feel as good as new, S.A.M. even remarked that I looked factory fresh. I am programmed to feel flattered.” He couldn’t hear Col’s response, but assumed he had asked A.D.A. to play his usual album. Operatic Russian sing-song filled the ship. Max was unsure if it had grown on him a little or if he was simply in a good mood due to how confident he was his plan would work, but either way he set off to confront Colimgar. 

The Vicar found the entire crew in the kitchen celebrating the end of their forced shore leave. Tomorrow it was off to Monarch to finally get rid of the live cargo. 

“Can’t wait to get those smelly, shitting things off the ship,” Ellie held up a bottle of Iceberg Aged Whiskey for a toast while the others, minus Parvati who held a jug of water, held their own, “To the Captain! For making it less unbearable!” 

“For making it less unbearable!” The crew repeated in unison and heads swung back to drink deeply. 

Max had been so caught up watching the ritual that he barely noticed Colimgar had snuck up on him. 

“Preacher,” Col held out a partially full bottle of Spectrum Vodka, his personal favorite, and Max took it. He had long forgone expecting a glass to come with the bottle, seeing as how they were all broken anyway, and he pressed the bottle to his lips. The liquid burned his throat pleasantly and filled his belly with warmth.

“Vodka, again? You are aware you’re a bit of a stereotype, right?” Max chuckled along with Colimgar before passing the bottle back. 

“Just because I had a half Russian daddy don’t mean anything,” Col took a sloppy swig and a bead of liquid escaped the corner of his mouth to dribble down his scruffy chin. Max watched it as it trailed down his neck and settled neatly into his collarbone. He imagined leaning over and lapping up the liquor with his tongue, dragging his mouth hotly over the Captain’s neck. He pictured Col quivering and that entire hard-ass facade crumbling under his touch. 

“I just like how it looks like water. Makes it easier to get away with day-drinking.” Colimgar’s cheeks were flushed. He wasn’t quite drunk yet but still pleasingly buzzed. “Here, Nyoka, polish that off for me why don’t you?” 

Max couldn’t help but crack a smile. “Feeling good, Captain?” He was still imagining the Captain in compromising positions and Col must have noticed the hint of it in his eyes. They locked eyes and seemed to measure each other up.

“Why, I think I’ll have to cancel that appointment to the eye doctor I scheduled for you, preacher. You eyes seem to work just fine after all, “ Col nudged Max playfully. The Vicar was unsure of where this uncharacteristic behavior suddenly came from, but Col’s next sentence answered a few of his questions. 

The Captain awkwardly segued into what Max could only assume was the real reason Col was acting so friendly, “I uh, I wanted to speak to you. In private?”

Max was aware without having to look that they had attracted the attention of the others now. He felt a somewhat smug sense of self satisfaction at having an audience to witness Col breaking character for the first time, “Of course, Captain. Your quarters, I assume?” His last words had pleasing ring to them. He never thought he’d be able to say them out loud, let alone in front of the entire crew. 

Colimgar gave him a nonplussed nod of agreement, almost seeming disinterested in the low whispers starting to surround them but Max knew better than most that the Captain was trying to save face. He could’ve toyed with Col a bit more, but instead followed dutifully behind. Once inside Max carefully folded his hands behind his back and looked at Col expectantly. 

“Thankyou, Vicar,” Colimgar gestured for Max to sit and busied himself at his personal mini wet bar, “Care for a drink?”

The corner of Max’s mouth lifted into a devious smirk as he replied, “No, thank you.”

Colimgar turned, holding two glasses. He sat opposite of Max on his messy bed while he took a sip from one glass and set the other down on the floor, “Will you take my confession?” 

It felt like getting hit by a two hundred pound midfielder wielding a Toss-ball stick. Suddenly Max couldn’t remember a word of English, let alone the carefully thought out plan he had prepared for what he had expected Col called him in here for. Max had been struck with a figurative curveball.

“I...what?” Max stumbled, blinking several times to be sure he wasn’t hallucinating. He autonomously accepted the drink as Col handed it to him and let it rest on his knee while he tried to collect his thoughts, “You want to confess? I thought you weren’t religious.” 

“I am, preacher. I gotta get something off my chest and you’re the only qualified person.” Col tipped his chin to the glass in Max’s hand, “You’ll be needing that.” Max raised the glass and swallowed back the contents in one go. Col asking anyone for help wasn’t even in the realm of possibility until now and Max had no idea how to process that except to keep moving forward. 

“Of course, Col- uh, Captain. I will offer you guidance. What troubles you?” His well practiced script sounded disingenuine to him. Almost as though the voice that came from his own mouth didn’t belong to him.

“I’ll thank you to not speak a word of this to the others. A little patience would also be welcome as...well I don’t know where to begin. I uh,” Colimgar’s face briefly twisted up as if he were fighting back a powerful emotion and he cleared his throat, “First want to apologize for how I’ve been treating you. It’s unworthy of me.”

Max’s mouth fell slightly agape as he pondered on how to respond. There were no words. 

“I been thinking about you a lot lately… lot’s of impure thoughts... and... I uh..I’ve been wondering if we could,” He rubbed the back of his neck and his cheeks flushed a dull red. He tried to hide his face from Max behind his arm, “Law, preacher. I’m a fucking mess. It’s out of line even asking a man of the cloth such a thing.” 

Colimgar had said this as Max was taking a sip of his drink and the question made him choke on fluid. Max coughed, trying to dislodge the trapped fluid from his throat before he turned his wide eyed gaze on Col. “I’m sorry, what?” Max wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, “Are you... propositioning me?” 

“A little...yea,” Colimgar stared into his glass, “I’m...You can say no, preacher. This part is normally straight forward. I know we’ve had our differences, but I seen the way you look at me sometimes and it got me wondering if...”

Max considered him carefully. Here he sat, right where he planned to be, but instead of himself, Colimgar had been the one to bring up the tricky subject. The Captain had proverbially snatched the rug right out from under him and tried to hand it back. “You have my attention. What, exactly, are you expecting from me?” He leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. 

“Well,” Col got up and used the moment it took to refill his glass with liquid courage to gather his scrambled thoughts, “Out there, I’m the Captain. I’m in charge. In here…I want someone else to take control. I need someone like you to...uh… it’s just I can’t think straight when you’re around and...” He fell silent as Max joined him to stand just close enough to pop his thought bubble. Col hesitated before he poured Max another glass. His lips parted slightly as he meant to continue, but no words came out. He lost track of what he had been saying. 

“Let me help you. You said you’ve been thinking about me,” Max held the glass to his lips and slowly glanced up and down Col’s form. He couldn’t help but notice Col’s erection through his tight pants, “What do you want me to do?” 

Col took a half step closer as his hand abandoned his drink on the table to rest at his side, “I want you to have your way with me. Simple as that. You don’t have to be nice to me, during or after. Just... physical.”

Max hooked his finger under Col’s rugid chin and leaned forward, just close enough to whisper touch his lips to Col’s, “You continue to surprise me, Captain. You’ve never so much as hinted that you want anything to do with me and now you want me to fuck you? What makes you think I’ll do it?”

Col shivered and his eyes flitted in between the Vicar’s mouth and his eyes, “I-...I’ll do whatever you want me to.” 

The Vicar smirked deviously, about a thousand possibilities racing through his mind before he settled on a handful of scenarios he would like to see play out. “Take off your clothes, then get on your knees.” He took a step back until he was close enough to lean against the wet bar. Drink in hand, he meant to watch Col until he was ready to proceed.   
“A.D.A.?” Col had immediately started eagerly peeling off the layers of his clothes. 

“Yes, Captain Hawthorne?” The ships A.I. chirped over the speaker in the room. 

“Set the mood and lock my door. No disturbances,” Cols voice shook as he felt his heart thunder from anticipation. It drove him mad with desire just looking at Max stand their with a cooled temperament. Col hoped he wouldn’t be gentle. 

The lights dimmed just enough so that the ambient glow of outer space flooded in and transformed the cluttered, plant filled space into an almost alien jungle. Colimgar finished yanking off his underwear and threw it haphazardly to the floor before he sunk to his knees and sat on his heels. 

Max drank in the scene, tracing the lines of muscle and curve of softer flesh with his eyes. He took a few moments to pace slowly around Col and let his fingers drag over surprisingly soft, freckled skin. His feet kicked open Col’s legs so that he could step between them. Col’s stiff cock pressed against Max’s leg and he let out a soft groan as Max took a fistful of his iridescent hair and tugged his head backwards. He made Col look up at him as his other hand floated towards his belt.

“Show me…” Max groped at himself while he rubbed the head of his cock over Col’s half open mouth and plush lips, “Let me see how bad you want it.” 

Colimgar straightened up and leaned in until he had swallowed Max’s cock. His tongue burned hot stripes, trailing enthusiastically up and down as his head began to bob. Max grunted and clenched his fingers tighter in Col’s hair. The sharp pain made Col emit a small sound trapped in the back of his throat. 

“Fuck,” Max muttered in a low voice. He was enraptured simply watching the act as Col’s lips stretching provocatively over his cock and his dark, hungry eyes were locked on Max’s. He flattened his palms on either side of Col’s head, thumbs rubbing small appreciative circles in his scalp, as Max began testing how much punishment his throat could take. Col struggled to breath through his nose and tears rolled down his hot cheeks as the Vicar went deeper and pumped harder. The Captain gripped tightly to Max’s clothes and half-closed his eyes in an attempt to focus on letting Max fuck his throat raw and not choking in the process. 

The Vicar peeled away reluctantly, relishing the gasp for air Col took as his cock left a sinewy trail of saliva behind. Max felt his fine motor skills misfire as his fingers fumbled for the snaps of his vestments. He chuckled to himself. It had been a while since he’d had this much fun with another person like this. “Now, be a good boy and lay on the table.” 

Col almost wanted to remind the Vicar that he was thirty-eight, not a boy, and technically much older than that, but thought better on it. No need to unpack all of that when he was enjoying himself. He cleared a space on his desk and watched Max undress slowly. 

Max, now matched in disrobe with Col, placed himself once again between Col’s thighs and guided him to lay flat on his spine with one hand. His other hand pawed and groped the inside of Col’s thigh. “Tell me how bad you want me right now.”

“I- oh fuck,” Col stuttered as Max’s hand dragged down his chest with digging fingertips until he reached the leaking head of his cock. He gripped Col firmly and used the precum as lube for his thumb as it rolled in circles over the tip. Col moaned softly and bucked his hips into Max’s hand. “Law...Max, I want you to fuck me.” 

“I’m not convinced yet,” Max idly pumped his fist along Col’s shaft at a dizzyingly frustrating pace. 

“Grand fucking Architect, what do you want me to say? Just fu-ah,” Col growled and his back arched sharply as Max’s hand wandered south and stumbled upon the surprise. The sudden touch zapped through him and left behind a warm glow.

“What’s this,” Max’s fingertips searched the surface of a hard object in place of the sticky, warm entrance he expected. His eyes lit up with glee as Col obligingly rolled onto his stomach to show him. “Impatient are we?” Max gripped the base with his fingertips and gave it a test tug. 

Col groaned open mouthed into his arm in an attempt to muffle himself.

“Did you think of me when you put it in?” Max leaned his full weight on Col and rested his chest on his back so he could whisper in his ear, “You took some of the fun out of it. I was hoping I could stretch you out myself. I suppose I’ll have to punish you for that.” 

“Don’t be an ass,” Col groaned loudly as Max twisted the object around and planted a firm slap on his ass. 

“I won’t fuck you until you tell me,” Max felt himself aching to replace the toy with himself, almost painfully, but he enjoyed watching his Captain squirm more. He was curious to know how big the thing was. “Did you think of me?” 

“Y-yes...oh fuck… I thought of you,” Col panted. His hands had nothing but the table to grip as Max slowly removed it inch by inch until he was empty. Max tossed it aside and forcefully readjusted Col’s legs for a better angle. He pressed his thumbs into the curve of flesh that met the thighs just under the buttocks and his fingers squeezed with bruising strength. The head of his cock prodded at Col with the intention of teasing him until he begged for it. 

“Law, Max, I want you so bad it hurts. Please.” Col whimpered. 

The corner of Max’s mouth curved devilishly. He turned and grabbed something Col couldn’t see until it was too late, “Hush now. We don’t want the other to hear, do we?” Max gagged Col with his own underwear as he pinned him down. Without ceremony or hesitation Max buried his cock deep and he wasted no time pounding a vicious, needy stride into Col. The Captain’s body writhed satisfactorily underneath him. The cloth in his mouth deadened the howl of pleasure that erupted from his his chest. 

Max reached forward as the sound of smacking flesh deafened every other sound and wrapped his vice-like grip around Col’s throat. He pulled Col towards him, pushing how far his back could bend to the limits, and pressed his lips to Col’s ear. “You’re being so good for me. Is this what you wanted?”

Col’s strangled moans couldn’t escape from the cloth and he could barely nod his head in response. The exquisite pain was driving all other thoughts from mind leaving only it, him and Max behind. 

The Captain’s eyes rolled back and remained there even as Max came to a violent, shuddering climax inside of him. Max separated from him with an elongated groan and rested his throbbing cock on Col while they caught their breath. 

He watched Col unsteadily yank the underwear from his mouth and let out a long sigh. 

“We should fuck more often, preacher,” Col winced as he peeled himself from the table with shaky limbs, “I feel proper religious now.”

Max gave him a short bark of a laugh and shook his head, “Certainly it looks like you’ll need more punishment to temper that tongue.” A small voice somewhere in the back of his mind was almost singing, but he ignored what it was telling him. 

Colimgar lit a cigarette and sat on the desk, ignoring the sticky residue he’d left behind. “I’d like to see you fucking try. It’s gonna take more than that to make me crack.” He knew full well Max wasn’t going to let him get away with saying that. Col didn’t bother feigning surprise as Max took his cigarette a puffed on it before flicking it aside.

“Oh?” Max tugged Col’s hips toward his and he sunk his mouth over Col’s neck, burning a hole in his flesh with longing. 

Col’s arm wrapped around Max’s shoulders and he muttered, “Ye-bat...I mean...f-fuck.” 

Max smirked against his feverish skin while he guided their bodies to lay flat on the table, “That’s right. Fuck.” He didn’t bother gagging Col for round two.


	2. Chapter 2

Maintaining the Unreliable and keeping the crew fed was often fairly expensive and so most of the time they found themselves lacking funds. Luckily, with most of the crew being morally gray on the definition of stealing scraping together enough bits to survive was simple enough. Hustling the locals became something like a tradition for the crew after it had saved their skin more than once.

Today, the Unreliable needed a replacement part for the liquid droplet radiator, otherwise the crew was likely to boil alive the next time they were space-bound. The ship managed to limp into Fallbrook and the crew emerged with only slightly steaming skin. 

“Miss Holcomb...Mr. Millstone,” The Captain was already peeling off his sweat soaked shirt as they all migrated as a herd together towards Fallbrook’s waterfall, “You remember what I told you?” The two ‘kids’ were still in the dark about the Captain’s more unsavory business tactics and he aimed to keep it that way. 

Parvati fanned herself and her smile teetered more towards discomfort as she felt momentarily woozy, “Yessir. Odd jobs and such. Just like normal.” She rushed ahead of the others and sunk into the cool water with a loud sigh of relief. Felix was next, at least bothering to take off his shoes before getting soaked, followed by Nyoka, who cannonballed into the river, and Ellie, who simply squatted on the shore and splashed water on her face. Max glanced discreetly at the Captain as he stripped while he followed Ellie’s example. 

“Stiff as a board, light as a feather,” Colimgar shouted as he performed his signature dive off a short escarpment in nothing but his unders. His form was perfectly stiff with his fists pressed to his hips as if he were posing for a heroic snapshot as he sailed from the bank into a belly flop.

“I’m gonna go scope out our prospects,” Ellie announced to the only person listening, Max, as she turned her back on the shenanigans and proceeded to town. 

“I suppose I’ll just… babysit these nitwits,” Max sighed. He soaked a rag in the cool water and dabbed it on the back of his neck. Some weeks ago, he may have been annoyed by their antics, but he supposed he was getting used to it by now. It was strangely relaxing just simply watching them enjoy themselves. Max leaned his back as comfortably as possible against a boulder. He used the jacket Col had lent him for use when his vestments weren’t practical as support and undid the top few buttons on his, also borrowed, shirt to let the breeze cool his skin. His eyes closed and he began to feel somewhat drowsy. Before long, the world was dead to him and he dreamed of the Captain’s prize winning smile. 

“Hey,” Col’s voice roused Max from a deep sleep. 

“Hmm,” Max was sluggish to respond, “What do you want?” He tried to empathise with his tone that he wanted to be left alone but it fell short of a sleepy grunt. 

“I didn’t want to wake you up cause you looked peaceful, but we oughta head out now,” Col stroked his knuckle across Max’s cheek affectionately. 

Max rolled away, inwardly surprised by the out of character tenderness Col was showing him, and he groaned, “Who are you and what did you do with Colimgar?” He could feel Col crawl over him on hands and knees as he kept his eyes closed.

“You caught me. I’m actually a hungry mantisaur that ate Colimgar and now I’m wearing his flesh. You’re next,” Col leaned down and buried his face in Max’s neck while he made playful growling noises. 

Max cracked a grin and pushed Col’s face away, finally feeling awake enough to will his eyes open, “Okay, alright. Stop. I’m awake.” He sat up as Col rolled off of him and rubbed his eyes, “I must have overheated. I’m fine now, thank you. Let’s go check on the kids, shall we?” 

Meanwhile, at The Tipsy Sprat, Ellie and Nyoka were hustling some young tourist from Byzantium with the intention of robbing him of every bit he had. ‘Reappropriating excessive wealth’ was the term Colimgar usually liked to use. Cheating an idiot out of his money was what it was. 

“By the Grand Architect,” The young man looked at his handful of cards and then the two women opposite to him, “I didn’t expect to meet such...adept players out here. Let alone two quite as beautiful as the both of you.”

Ellie waved her hand in an ‘oh stop it, you’ gesture and fluttered her eyelashes, “We didn’t expect someone so handsome, either, right Nyoka?”

“Yea,” Nyoka was well into her cups by now but kept up the charade with delight, “So handsome. Better looking than the sulfur-sodden local wildlife, that’s for sure.”

They all shared an exaggerated laugh. 

“Oh hey,” Nyoka’s keen eyes darted to the movement she saw from the corner of her eye, “It’s the old grumpy man and the even older grumpier man. Have a good nap?” 

“Oh? Is this the Captain you spoke of?” The young man stood up and stumbled towards Col a bit as he reached for a formal handshake. Ellie had made sure he was well lubricated with enough Iceberg aged Whiskey to make him suggestible to betting more money. “My good sir, you do look the type. Yes. Very dashing, I’d say. W-” He hiccuped, “Would you care to join us?” 

Colimgar shook his hand with a firm grip, “I don’t gamble with cards anymore, son. Need all of my luck for greater challenges.” He used a line from an adventure serial to great effect as the young man was soon too distracted asking his newfound ‘space hero’ questions about his adventures to notice Ellie and Nyoka were winning the game by a landslide. 

“A Mantiqueen? Oh my! What then?” He was so enraptured that it took a moment for the flashing ‘0’ on his bit cartridge to register in his mind, “W-what? I? ZERO?!”

“Tough luck,” Ellie smiled at the four digit number flashing on hers, “Looks like we won.”

The young man suddenly stood and ran out of the Tipsy Sprat as though he was being chased by a Manti-swarm. The table paused to look at each other with similar ‘did you see that’ expressions before erupting with laughter. 

“Thanks for the assist, Captain. He was oggling at us so hard I thought he was gonna call Nyoka’s bluffs,” Ellie lit a cigarette and kicked her feet up on the table, dropping the delicate flower routine that worked so well on gullible targets like the previous one. 

Nyoka kicked the foot of her chair, “Look who’s talking. Why were you blinking so much? No one blinks that much.” 

“Ellie, have you seen my children?” Col leaned over the table and claimed a bottle of booze for himself. 

“Why the fuck are you asking me?” She scoffed. 

“You’re the sober one,” He didn’t bother with a glass and gave Nyoka a wink. 

“Ugh,” She kicked off the table and put her cigarette out in the wood, leaving the butt where it lay, “So now I gotta go find them. You’re a pain in the ass.” She stood up and turned her attention to Max, “C’mon Vicky. I know you don’t wanna spend your night watching these two drunks perform their bizarro ritual.”

“For once, you’re right,” Max got up and gave Col a reprimanding gaze, “We’ll be back. Don’t cause trouble.”

Col waited just long enough for them to be out of ear shot before he chugged the rest of the bottle. He slammed it down, hissing through the burn, and turned to shout at the bartender, “Hey you, bring me and my friend a bottle, each, every five minutes until we black out, okay?” 

“Ready to settle that score, Captain?” Nyoka restrained from taking another drink just yet as she waited for him to catch up and make this a fair competition. She would wait until they agreed he was just as drunk and then the game would begin in earnest. First one under the table lost. 

“Winner gets bragging rights,” He toasted to the successful day. 

Hours later and Col was beginning to see four Nyoka’s. They were laughing about something, but neither of them really remembered what set them off. It didn’t really matter, almost nothing did in fact, and he wore a permanent grin as he tried to count the bottles, “Ten...uh..thirteen..shit, hang on.” 

Nyoka and him would often dare each other to do certain tasks while they were in this advanced state of inebriation, and just then she saw the perfect challenge. “Hey, Cap,” She pulled him close with one arm slung around his neck to whisper shout as discreetly as a Raptidon Colossus charging it’s prey, “I dare you...hehehe...that shapely looking lady there in the corner is Evangeline. She’s been eyeing you all night but I bet you’re too soaked to get lucky.”

Col and Nyoka snickered and he shook his head, “Oh c’mon, you seen me? I’m a ‘dashing space captain’. Remember?” He did a sloppy impression of the man they robbed blind and the two were sent into a fit of laughter.

“Fifty bits says you bore her to death when you bring up your stupid hydro-whatsit garden,” Nyoka nudged him and Col stumbled towards Evangeline chuckling. He slid in close and put on the charm. Evangeline smiled as Col leaned in to whisper something in her ear and just like that the smile vanished. He leaned back, looking mighty proud of himself, and then she slapped him across the mouth. 

Col turned around holding his jaw with a bewildered expression as Nyoka nearly passed out from laughter. He looked around the room, hoping to find at least one sympathetic face, but instead locked eyes with Max. 

—-

The subsequent hike back to the Unreliable was incredibly tense as Max stormed ahead with Col not far behind gently trying to call his attention. Once onboard, however, the crew took shelter in the cargo bay as an explosive argument broke out between the two. Nyoka was reeling from the surprise she received when the two unintentionally revealed their secret relationship. It was a more unlikely pairing for her, and the others too, than a Raptidon and a Mantiqueen. She almost felt guilty for encouraging Col, but that feeling was overshadowed by the mutual embarrassment she shared with the crew as they tried not to hear the spat. 

“Max, it didn’t mean nothing,” Col was trying not to raise his voice, but Max was irritatingly brushing him off as he climbed the stairs, “C’mon talk to me!”

“Of course it meant nothing,” Max growled under his breath, “Nothing means anything to you.”

“What does that even mean,” Col reached out for him but Max tidily dodged his grasp, “You’re the one who acts like he doesn’t care! What do you even want?”

“I want you to get your foot out of the way so I can close the door,” Max narrowed his eyes. He felt a nudge away from bloodshed. “And you’re right, I don’t care. Go fuck her if you want. Architect, fuck the whole town if that pleases you.” 

“Fine,” Colimgar threw his hands up in frustration, “Maybe I will!”

“Fine,” Max closed his door in Col’s face.

“Fine!” Col screamed back, but received only silence. 

—-

The next morning was more tense than a live shoot-out. Max and Col refused to speak so much as a word as they carried on their daily routines like nothing had happened last night. The dead air in the room felt suffocating and the crew ate their breakfast as quickly as possible just to escape. 

“For fuck’s sake,” Ellie sighed once she, Nyoka, Felix, and Parvati reached fresh air, “I didn’t think they could get more annoying, but here they are acting like two old farts who been married so long they hate each others guts.” 

“It makes me sad seeing ‘em like this,” Parvati had spent the entire night unable to sleep, and it showed, “The Captain and the Vicar are nice when they have their moments. Maybe they’ll talk if we give them space?” 

“I doubt it,” Nyoka usually found Parvati’s optimism heart-warming, but now it just made her feel sorry for her, “Two pricks like that don’t cancel each other out like in the romance serials.” 

“You listen to romance serials?” Felix chimed in.

“Focus, sweetie,” Ellie rolled her eyes, “Let’s see if it simmers while we’re gone. I can’t imagine it was all that serious anyway, seeing as how it breaks the laws of physics just having the two pair together in the first place.” 

“I dunno,” Parvati smiled sheepishly, “The more I think about it, they could be a cute couple. I known Vicar Max for years, kinda, and he seems like the kind of man who cloistered himself up just waiting for the right person. Also I know the Captain’s been real lonely since... well it’s not my place to say.”

Ellie, Nyoka, and Felix pivoted on their heels to face her and simultaneously said, “Since what?”

—-

Back on the Unreliable, Max had dedicated the rest of his day to reading in his room, but he found it frustratingly hard to focus on the task. After he read the same paragraph ten times and didn’t absorb any of the words written down he angrily threw the book aside and instead buried his head in his hands. He tried to avoid giving his doubts too much thought. At the moment he mostly hated Colimgar, for several reasons, but there was this persistent nagging internal voice reminding him that he cared for him too. No amount of denial could suppress that. Reluctantly, he admitted to himself that he’d never expected to be so hurt over something so trivial. 

Max reluctantly gave up on his original plan to hide in his room for the foreseeable future. He simply wanted to get over this snag quickly rather than drag it out any longer, and he made it as far as his door before he ran into the very person he was seeking. 

Col looked guilt-ridden, heart-and-soul, as he stood frozen with his fist raised to knock at a door that was no longer there. He hesitated before sliding his hand over his hair and glancing at the floor, “Hey, Vicar.” 

Max opened his mouth to speak, but as often he found himself around the Captain he was speechless. 

“I know I have no right speaking to you right now, seeing as I was caught red-handed,” He paused to consider his words carefully while his hands folded together and fidgeted nervously, “In a dead man’s defense, I didn’t know you were serious bout… us… but I should have considered it. I’d understand if you wanna end this here.” He kept his eyes low. 

“We aren’t serious,” Max blurted out. His denial had seized control briefly, but no matter how much he instantly regretted it he couldn’t take back what he just said. He rapidly thought of a way to back-peddle as he watched Col’s heart visibly break. “But...that doesn’t mean we can’t still enjoy each others company.”

Col finally lifted his eyes to meet his, confusion and hope blending together in his sharp features. 

“I…” Max shifted from one foot to the other when he realized he had been standing too rigidly, “Perhaps we can speak about this in your room?”

“Of course,” Col gave him a soft, genuine smile, the first Max had ever seen, and he led the way. 

An almost automatic flow of images of them in compromising positions occupied Max’s thoughts while he trailed calmly behind. It surprised him how easy it was for his mind to wander there. He’d already forgiven Col and now he just wanted to drown out the mutinous speculations clawing at the edge of his mind. They seemed to grow louder everyday and it was becoming harder for Max to avoid pondering what he instinctually already knew. 

Once they reached the privacy of Col’s room Max paused to visually peruse the space, finding it somewhat entertaining that it seemed to change ever so slightly every time he walked in. Almost as if the room itself was sentient and constantly shifting. The mounted Mantiqueen head in the corner was new. 

Colimgar was busy digging around in a crate that appeared to be full of junk, “I know a simple apology won’t do this time, so I’ll give you a choice.” He was nearly about to dive into the crate before he resurfaced and held two objects behind his back as he faced Max, “That is, if you’re willing to give me another chance?” 

Max scrutinized him warily, unsure of where this was leading, but he gave Col a curt nod. 

“I was saving these for a special occasion, but now seems appropriate enough,” He held out his hands and Max’s eye first caught a glint in his left hand and a simple bundle of rope in the right, “I got you these prayer beads a while ago, but never found the right moment to give em to you. Kept tellin’ myself you probably prefer your own but… well here they are.” 

Max approached to get a better look and marveled at how uniquely opalescent each bead was. He assumed these had to be from Byzantium, which made Max wonder where he had gotten them seeing as they hadn’t set foot in the golden city. His attention turned to the rope out of curiosity, “They’re lovely, Col, but what is the rope for?”

“For me.” Col said flatly as if it had been obvious what its purpose was for. When Max didn’t seem to quite catch his meaning he continued, “You looked ready to strangle me yesterday and to be honest I kind of deserved it. I figured this was a decent compromise.”

“You surprise me,” Max uttered, having no idea what else to say. The blood in his brain was quickly rushing to other parts of his body and leaving him less capable of stringing together more eloquent phrases. 

“It’s not good enough,” Col began to second guess himself and searched around his room for something else to offer, “Whatever you want, Max, it’s yours.”

He was ready to scurry back to the crate to continue his hunt when Max closed the gap and pressed his lips to Col’s. His tongue urgently sought out a way to tell Col things he couldn’t say with words. Col was firm, but submissive in response and allowed Max to lead him. He enveloped Max in his arms and melted into the embrace. 

“You,” Max breathed hotly as they parted. Their faces were so close he could smell the subtle musk of Col’s warm skin and it felt more intoxicating than whiskey. “I want you.” Max briefly pictured Colimgar as he was last night with that woman and an unpleasant jealousy squeezed his heart. He would make Col his, in his own way. “Undress and give me the rope.”

Col didn’t waste a second of time heeding Max’s bidding and nearly tripped over his own pants as he eagerly disrobed. Max found it especially endearing how when he had finished he waited with bated breath for the next task.

“You really enjoy this, don’t you?” Max asked as he hung the rope from Col’s neck and looped it between his legs. 

“The word you’re looking for is masochist, daragoi,” Col attempted to follow the Vicar’s movements with his eyes until he disappeared behind his back, “What are you doing?” He had been expected Max to tie him to the table or the chair, but whatever he was doing was new to Col. 

“You’ve called me that more often lately, ‘daragoi’. Is that a pet name?” Max nimbly weaved the rope around Col’s form, fingertips stealing quick glances over muscular flesh. He finished by tightly securing both arms behind Col’s back in a way that left no room to move them.

“Of sorts,” Col sucked his breath in through his teeth when Max tested the tightness of the knots, “I uh...I feel somehow more exposed.” He looked down at himself, his cock harder than it had ever felt, and back to Max as he stood back to admire his handiwork, “You trussed me up like a cystypig, now what?” 

Max reclined into the chair and spread his legs invitingly, beckoning Col to come closer with the waggle of one finger, “If you’re lucky? You won’t be able to sit for the rest of the day.” 

“Law…” Col dutifully sunk to his knees in between Max’s thick thighs, “You are some kind of fucked up, but you got me feeling some type of way so-”

Max pulled him to lay across one side of his body. His hand taking a fistful of hair and tugging ruthlessly while Col’s weight leaned into his arm and chest. He sucked at Col’s exposed neck with every intention of leaving a mark while his free hand hungrily groped Col’s ass. A full body tremor pulsed through Col as he groaned loudly next to Max’s ear. “The others won’t be back for hours, Col. I’m going to make you cry my name until your throat is sore.” Max’s hand rose and fell with a flat palm on Col’s backside. 

Max continued with his prescribed punishment, smiling deviously as he earned a varying sound with each strike. He had every intention of going until Col’s ass was redder than a mock-apple. However, his determination crumbled after only a few minutes of punishment as Col grinded against him and pleaded for more. Max laid his hand flat on Col’s backside, warmth radiating pleasantly from the flesh there, and he buried his nose into the comforting smell of Col’s hair. He could feel himself straining painfully through his pants. After a moment he nudged Col upright so that he could solve that problem. 

Col gave him a smoldering gaze as his darkened eyes followed Max’s hands to his belt. “Max, let me.” He waited patiently until Max pulled his cock out. His tongue fervently mapped every inch of hardened flesh before he entirely engulfed Max in his mouth. A small choke pushed past his lips as Max bucked into the back of his throat. 

“Col…” Max ran gentle fingers through Col’s hair as he leaned his head back, “Law, that’s good.” He groaned as Col’s tongue slid hotly over his head in dizzying circles before he drifted down and turned his focus on more sensitive parts of Max. It finally became unbearable for Max and he gently pulled Col away, “Get on the bed.”

Col looked behind him at his glorified cot with a scrupulous expression. He wasn’t entirely sure the two of them could comfortably fit on it together but the rustle of clothing hitting the floor motivated him to make his way over. He walked with an awkward gait and gingerly attempted to lay down without hurting his sore backside but ended up failing miserably. Col hissed through gritted teeth and then moaned when the pain morphed into pleasure. 

Max quickly snatched the bottle of lubrication, having learned weeks ago where Col hid his ‘tools’, and climbed into the bed. He manipulated Col so that he was on his side, one leg resting between Max’s thighs and one draped over his shoulder. “So beautiful,” Max uttered as he took a moment to drink in the scene that lay before him. His slickened fingers easily found their way inside Col and began pumping back and forth. Col buried his face in his pillow as he writhed under Max’s white-hot touch. His muffled moans urged Max further.

“Let me hear you,” His tone was firm as he pulled his hand away and gripped his cock to guide it towards his objective. He shifted his hand to Col’s hip and pinned him in place so he could fuck him without mercy. 

Col turned his face towards Max, “I’m yours, Max. Oh, fuck...whatever happens-ah… I’m yours.” He closed his eyes as Max’s cock found the perfect angle and hit that certain spot just right. Max buried his face in Col’s leg at first, losing a piece of himself every time Col said his name, before he felt overcome. He drowned as the wave of pleasure surged over him, body and mind. Max took a moment to compose himself as he leaned over Col on hands and knees, “You’re mine.”

He bowed his head to kiss Col, softer than he thought himself capable, and rested his forehead against Col’s shoulder. “And I’m yours.”


	3. Chapter 3

There was a notable shift in the crew’s demeanor the following morning after their little spat. Today, “Za okoshkom svetu malo” played softly over the ship’s speakers as the Captain prepared a standard breakfast. Instead of Max being the first to arrive, they all came as one and eagerly sat at the table. Max thought he noticed Parvati mouth a silent ‘sorry’ in his direction before she took her seat, but he brushed it off as his mind was still fast asleep in his bed. 

Nyoka and Ellie, in particular, looked rather full of life as they smiled at each other covertly. Felix, as usual, simply looked forward to the hot meal and stared at their strange behavior dumbfounded. Max barely had time to pour his cup of coffee before he heard a soft giggle and the pieces clicked together for him. He turned slowly, eyes narrowed at the crew, and he sighed. Of course, he had almost forgotten about last night, and now the whole ship knew. 

He shared a meaningful look with Colimgar as he peered over the rim of his mug and chose to stay upright rather than sit at the table with the others in case he needed to make a quick escape. Colimgar wordlessly served breakfast to the crew, bringing Max his plate separately, before he returned to the kitchen counter and turned his back on them. He knew it was a matter of time before the interrogation would start, but feigned ignorance for now as he mentally prepared. 

“Sooo,” Ellie started with an overly sweet tone, “You two! That’s… cute?” She looked back and forth between them with a mocking smile. 

Max rolled his eyes and chose to ignore the taunt while Col kept his back turned and continued putting things away as if he hadn’t heard a word. Safely behind his coffee mug, Max smiled slightly when he saw their combined silence made Ellie’s bravado falter, if only slightly. 

“When’s the wedding?” She took a bite of her food and paused, “You two gonna adopt Felix?” 

Parvati timidly spoke up, “Oh leave ‘em be.” She had clearly been against this little inquiry. 

Felix looked around, almost hopeful, and sunk into his chair when he realized no one was serious about adoption. He played it off as a need to readjust in his chair, but kept it to himself that he thought it might be nice to officially call Colimgar ‘dad’. 

Ellie laughed with mirth and shook her head, “Now that wouldn’t be fun, would it? These two pick on us all the time, I think it’s their turn.” Nyoka and Felix seconded that and Parvati lowered her eyes to her plate. 

“Ellie,” Colimgar opened the fridge and snagged himself a cold beer, “Do the dishes when everyone’s done eating.” 

“No can do, not my turn,” She propped her foot up on the bench and cleaned her teeth with a toothpick while she pushed her half-eaten plate towards Felix.  
Colimgar tapped on his infamous chore board with a stiff finger and Ellie did a triple take when she saw a long list of tasks next to her name, “What the fuck?” 

“Next time I hear you pressuring Parvati into talkin’ about stuff she doesn’t wanna tell you, I’ll make you clean every inch of the cargo bay with a toothbrush. Am I understood?” Colimgar couldn’t restrain a smug smile as Ellie got up to engage him face to face. There was a brief back and forth between them as Ellie tried to shift blame and escape dreaded chores while Colimgar was as immovable and stubborn as usual. 

Max was absolutely beaming at the spectacle and making no attempt to hide it. He could have watched them go at it all day until Nyoka spoke up and shifted the entire mood. 

“Let’s talk about something more interesting,” She leaned forward, as serious as the grave, “You expect people to believe you’re a survivor of the Hope?” 

In that moment if a pin dropped it could have been heard. Colimgar’s face fell and he snapped his eyes to Nyoka. She started to laugh after a moment and Ellie and Felix joined in. Parvati sunk under the table as discreetly as possible but Col’s harsh, calculating eyes followed the movement. It dawned on him that she had told them something he confided in her when he was too drunk to know better. He grit his teeth, the continued laughter slowly sounding more distant as he sunk inward. 

Max felt oddly protective as he watched Col instantly fold, but also curious about what Nyoka had asked him. The Hope had been a colony ship that was lost over seventy years ago. No survivors. Without more context Max was in the dark, torn between wanting to escort Col away before he unraveled further and wanting to know what was going on. 

The three finally calmed down and Ellie probed more, “How could I have forgotten? Parvati said ‘you was so lonely on account you were unfrozen and all your family and friends were still on the Hope’. Is that like, some fucked up pick up line? Did you use it on Vicky?”

Colimgar was so tense that up close you could see him almost vibrating with anger. He lifted his eyes to look at Ellie while the muscles in his jaw flexed. For just a moment there was nothing in his eyes but cold animosity. He looked down quickly, trying to find something for his shaking hands to occupy. “Do the damn dishes,” He muttered and shouldered past Ellie roughly before he disappeared down the hall. 

“Wait,” Felix looked around in surprise, “I didn’t get to ask my question.” The Captain was already long gone. Felix wasn’t sure what had just happened, but it did make him feel a little guilty for laughing. “Damn, wanted to know why he wakes us up so early.”

“I told you kid, it’s so he gets the bathroom to himself before Max hogs it,” Nyoka triggered another fit of laughter.  
Max had seen enough and slipped away from the throng easily enough. They were all too busy trading jokes on The Captain’s behalf to notice if a live raptidon was chewing on them. He knocked on Col’s door, half expecting an angry voice to tell him to ‘fuck off’. 

“May I come in?”

To his surprise the door opened after a moment of slow shuffling heard on the other side. Colimgar promptly turned his back and picked up a pair of trimming shears. He quietly pruned one of his many plants while Max locked the door and sat on the bed, “Did they get to you?” 

Col didn’t speak for several moments, instead turning his focus on his work, but Max’s probing gaze broke him down. He shoulders relaxed and he looked over, “Naw...they’re just nosy.”

“I just don’t know what could possibly be so interesting about you that would have them gossiping like juveniles,” Without being sure how he would react Max knew it was dicey trying to poke fun at Col, but he also saw it as his chance to lighten the mood. Thankfully, it did just the trick. 

Col snorted quietly and smiled in a way that made the age lines around his eyes crease. Max had fond feelings for that small, rarely seen detail. It was one of his favorite things about the man. “It’s...yea I’d probably think I was lying too.” Col got a distant look in his eyes before he returned his attention to the potted garden consuming his living space. 

“What, exactly, did Parvati reveal to Ellie?” Max tried to delicately phrase his words. While he didn’t mind the outcome of most of their fights, he’d rather not upset Col now. 

“You heard the gist,” Col paused to suck the end of a string and make it easier to tie a stint to a leaning shoot, “I shouldn’t exist. As far as what the Board told folk, everyone on the Hope is dead and gone seventy years now.” 

Max was having trouble believing Col, especially considering that would mean the Board went out of their way to lie for seemingly no reason. He knew they would often ‘skew the truth’ but it was usually for a practical purpose. There would be no necessary need to abandon some of the brightest minds Earth had to offer. Not one Max could discern, at least. “So...are you? Really?” 

Col’s steady fingers finished their task and he muttered something in another language to the flora. He wiped his hands on his already filthy combat pants and strode across the room with purpose. From a cluttered corner he produced a large crate draped with a blue tarp, “You remember when we first met?”

Max smirked crookedly, “Oh, you mean the time you called me an ass?”

“Exactly,” Col removed the tarp. As if the blatant and official lettering designating the crate’s origins to the Hope wasn’t enough, Col cracked it open and pulled out his hibernation suit. Max recognized it as the same suit he wore when they met in Edgewater, but he had failed entirely to notice the word “Hope” emblazoned on the shoulder patches and across the back. He had so easily written Colimgar off as a crazed vagabond who thought ‘tubes’ were still in fashion. Max became lost in his thoughts, holding the suit and scrutinizing it for forgery.. 

“Also, you were eyeballing me somethin fierce that day. I almost thought your peepers would pop out like them old cartoons,” Col guffawed and continued before Max could deny it, “I don’t blame you. This sumbitch was so tight, left nothing to the imagination.”

Max gave him a look that expressed he was slightly miffed for being called out, but couldn’t say it wasn’t true, “I’m still puzzled by a few things. How is this possible?” His attention turned to the other contents of the crate, seeing a variety of equipment and personal possessions. There was a smaller box within labeled in Col’s messy handwriting “Earth Seeds” that explained the exotic miniature jungle they were now surrounded by. 

“Mad scientist woke me up. Shoved me in an escape pod,” Col patiently allowed Max to satisfy his curiosity and poke around in the crate, “He wants me to wake the others up, save Halcyon.” He sat next to Max on the bed and a soft smile formed on his lips as he watched Max fiddle with an old wooden acrobat toy. 

“Save Halcyon from what?” Max set the plaything down and leaned on his knees as Col’s story started to really sink in. He still wasn’t completely certain, but surely Col had no reasonable benefit to gain from lying to Max like this. 

“The Board, I guess?,” Col scratched a rough patch on his chin and sighed. When he said it like that, it did sound far-fetched. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to do about it, but he thinks I can help him.” He got back up as an anxious urge made it hard for him to sit still any longer. Col quickly chugged his beer and made his hands as busy as possible as he dug through the crate for something specific. 

Max’s eye caught the edge of what appeared to be a leather bound book and he instinctively reached in to examine it. Col continued to dig as Max laid the book in his lap and spread his palm over the intricate details worked into the cover. The temper of the leather was soft and well worn. Max flipped open to the first page and realized it was Col’s family photo album. He slowly read the names of seven generations scrawled in ink on the front page and traced his finger down a slender branch until he found ‘Colimgar Bogomolov’. 

“Lot’s of embarrassing pictures of your handsome Captain in there, you’ve been warned,” Col chuckled as his hand reached the bottom and blindly grabbed until it found what he wanted. He yanked it out, disturbing the rest of the neatly packed contents, and revealed a bottle of clear liquor with a home-made label. As he made himself busy pouring each of them a shot, singing under his breath in Russian the entire time, Max flipped through the pictures. 

“You? Embarrassing?,” Max snorted and accepted his shot without looking, “Please. I’ve seen you eat beans from the can.” He raised the glass to his lips. Before he could even realize what was happening the fumes from the alcohol had rapidly traveled through his nostrils to punch him in the stomach. He spit some of the burning liquid back into the glass and held it out to stare at it in astonishment as if the glass had come to life and bit him, “What the hell is this stuff?” 

Col took his with a wince and smiled, “My dedushka’s masterpiece. He loved three things. His family, my babushka, and this.” He poured another shot and licked his lips as they went numb. “Don’t tell Nyoka though.” 

Max could feel his eyes watering just looking at it. He tried a second time, this time with more preparation, and found it left a rather satisfying heat in his core. It was slightly sweet on his tongue, but Max couldn’t quite pin-point the unique saccharine taste. 

Col scooted himself closer until he was practically rubbing against Max and flipped the book to the end. He pointed to a chubby cheeked baby, “There’s the bitch.” He smiled as Max laughed heartily. 

“Look at you,” Max cooed fondly and proceeded through the photos. He came across a group photo, where Colimgar appeared ten to twelve years old. There were four adults, two in their thirties and two elderly, and a toddler stood next to Col. 

“Sem’ya,” Col leaned his chin on Max’s shoulder and pointed to each member of his family, “Dedu, Baba, Pa, Ma, and my baby sister Endellia.” He trailed off as his eyes lingered on the image of his sister. 

Max turned his torso to look at Col incredulously, “Endellia? Does your family have something against normal names?” The two shared a laugh that was perhaps louder than it deserved to be and they continued to peruse Col’s memories. Max took another generous shot of the mystery drink and lost track of his previous train of thought, “Hey, what’s in this? It’s delicious.” He was only moderately aware of the dull throb that began to pulse in his chest. 

“Honey,” Colimgar gave him a velvety tone of voice and come-hither eyes, leaning forward slowly. 

Max, however, had the wherewithal to ask a poignant question before he carelessly melted into Col’s embrace, “Wait a moment. You’re trying to avoid talking about what’s really bothering you.” He gave Col a sly smirk and held him at bay with a steady hand. 

Col sighed with consternation and slumped, “C’mon Max. I’m not in the mood. I just wanna bury it where the sun don’t shine and forget it.”

“Just say it,” Max swayed as he found a more comfy position on the bed and set down the album, “Whatever it is you’re holding back, and you’ll feel better. It’s not healthy to hold it in, Col.”

“Wasn’t aware you were gonna use armchair psychology on me,” Col finished his third shot and felt the will to cleverly evade having to express his feelings leave him behind, “Fine. I’m doing this for my baby sister. She’s on the Hope.”

Max urged him to continue silently.

“I speak four languages fluently. Two conversationally. I’m a highly trained and capable bioengineer with decades of experience. I have many other specialized skills and knowledge to boot. Max, when I tell you Endellia makes me look like as dumb as a sack of rocks, I want you to know exactly what that implies. Her and the others, the things they could do for this Colony are... limitless.” He fidgeted with his glass, eyes glazing over as more painful, self-destructive thoughts broiled to the surface, “It shoulda been her that Phineas woke up. I’m not even sure...I guess it doesn’t matter really, seeing as I could succumb to explosive cell death at any moment.”

The weight of Col’s words took the wind out of Max, but it was that last tidbit that truly stunned him, “W-what? Explosive...cell death?”

“It’s...being in cryo for so long isn’t good for the human body. You see, certain bacteria can enter the bloodstream and begin to release a toxin called lipopolysaccharide, and in response enzymes activate inflammatory cytokines which leads to pyroptosis, breaking down the cell-membrane and...uh, well long explanation short if I start to seize on you it’s probably happening,” Col felt too sober and frowned at the bottle his Dedu had given him the day he boarded the Hope with Endellia. It hurt more than he had expected it to, but perhaps now that it was out of the way it would be easier to cope moving forward. He glanced over at Max to see how he was taking the news and smiled when he saw the humorous mix of shock and confusion on his face. 

“Why are you smiling? You just explained what sounds like a horrible death to me,” He put emphasis on the ‘horrible’ as he mentally struggled with the image. Max panicked inwardly, as if having knowledge of it’s possibility meant it would happen instantly. “Is there anything we can do?” 

Col’s smile dropped as he hadn’t expected Max to take it so poorly. Seeing him lose composure like this made Col feel guilty for even telling Max. It was a pittance of reassurance, but Colimgar had never been good at sugar coating, “Everything that could be done has been, daragoi. Hey, look at me. I’m still here.” 

Max allowed Colimgar to pull him into his arms. A flowery scent mingled with sweat and topsoil in Col’s clothing. He felt slightly consoled by the solid body he leaned on while pensively noting that he understood why Col hadn’t said anything until now. For the next hour or so, all Max did was stay put and listen to Col’s childhood stories. It felt oddly soothing being so close, providing himself as a trustworthy confidant while receiving one in Colimgar in return. Max felt he could almost tell him anything. Almost. 

—-

Three days later and the crew had already gotten over Max and Col’s affair. They still poked fun, but overall life continued on much like it always had. The two still maintained a strictly professional relationship in public, but occasionally they would share a revealing gaze. 

Max had just finished explaining to a rather intrusive merchant that he was not, in fact, sleeping with the now infamous Captain. It was technically true, as Max had never stayed the night in Col’s room, but still there was a certain level of denial there that conflicted with Max’s irrational urge to flaunt his ‘strictly physical’ relationship. He was in the middle of bringing aboard supplies when an alarm harshly resounded through the ship and Colimgar burst from his private lab that also happened to be the engine room. 

“Out. Out. Everyone out.” He bellowed at the crew, interrupting their impromptu Toss-Ball match in the cargo bay, “Chemical leak. Out.” 

Max and the others promptly retreated through the air-lock door, but Max felt his vestments snag on something, “What the?” 

“Hey-uh...preacher, need you to stay and uh...help clean. Yea,” Colimgar had snatched Max before he could even protest and practically corraled him up the ladder and into the engine room lab after locking the crew outside. “A-ADA,” Colimgar groaned loudly as he readjusted himself blatantly, “Vent the...uhhh...shit...Max help.”

Max’s nose recoiled the moment he got close enough to smell the ‘chemical leak’. The uniquely grotesque smell of unrefined Raptidon musk was far from unfamiliar to him. “Colimgar, you sprat-fucking moron, what in the sulfur-sodden Law did you do?” 

Col slid down the wall as he tugged helplessly on his belt as if his pants had filled with writhing, venomous snakes, “S-shut the fuck up and- ah… just do something.” He finally freed himself and immediately began stroking himself with fiery need. 

“A.D.A, please vent the engine room, we need...uhm,” Max quickly forgot what he had been saying as he watched his lover touch himself. The head of his cock was already leaking as he groped for sweet release. Max felt something almost animalistic dominate his senses as he heedlessly knelt on his knees over Col and dropped his mouth to meet Col’s throbbing cock. 

Col’s moaned carelessly and his fingers twisted through Max’s hair as he rutted roughly against his throat. Max crudely sucked and licked every inch of searing hot flesh before he aggressively tore Col’s boots and pants from him then pushed his shirt up. His mouth trailed upwards hastily, desperately, until his tongue found a sensitive spot and rolled in wet circles over it. 

“Fuck me...Max,” Col bucked into Max, whimpering as every touch was both not enough and too much, “Don’t fucking go easy on me.”

His hands manipulated Col’s lower body into his lap, folding him nearly in half in the process. Max took his thumb into his mouth and licked it generously before it disappeared between him and Col as he coarsely whispered against Col’s skin, “I learned this trick in prison.”

Col muffled a scream in his arm as Max’s thumb roughly broke the barrier between them and easily hit that angle that drove Col mad with pleasure. He rubbed strong, cloying strokes in Col for a few moments longer before he himself needed to feel more. Max pulled away and started clumsily unfastening his belt, his ragged breathing and foggy state of mind making his hands less useful as each second ticked by. Finally, Max sprung from his underwear and he made a low growling sound as breaching Col nearly dry was a slow, gruelling push until he’d finally sunk his cock in as deep as possible. 

Both of them shuddered pleasantly as the painful part was over and Max started pumping his hips. He gripped Col’s thighs roughly and pressed them into Col’s torso until they simply couldn’t go any further as his cock slid hypnotically from tip to base inside Col. Max practically grinded Col’s half exposed back into the hard steel floor as he fucked him as hard as physically possible. Col’s face was frozen in a silent open mouth moan as his arms struggled to hold his body in place for Max. They raised far above his head and pressed against the wall, elbows stiffly locked in place. 

“Oh...Law...Max!” Col’s toes curled and his eyes rolled back as a violent, whole body shudder marked his tiny death. His insides clenched so tightly that Max was doomed to follow shortly after him and the two collapsed into a pile of sweaty appendages and loud panting. 

As their faculties slowly returned to them, Max and Col shared mutually embarrassed words on how they usually lasted longer than that, before they shakily got to their feet. 

Max eyed Col with a smirk as he watched his man display a distinct limp, “Did I finally manage to bruise something? Perhaps next time you spill Raptidon musk in your lab we should have a safety word?”

“Oh shut up, old man,” Colimgar could tell the ventilation was somewhat effective, seeing as him and Max were coherent for the moment, but the musk would still take time to work out of his system. He considered telling the crew to avoid boarding for a while lest he was forced to deal with the aftermath of an awkward orgy. 

“I seem to recall you telling me the other day about how you’re technically turning one hundred and eighteen soon. If I’m old, you’re practically decrepit,” Max chuckled as he helped Col clean the culprit mess of shattered glass.

“Keep talking,” Col smirked devilishly, “We’re not out of the woods yet, daragoi. I estimate I have thirty seconds left of rational thought before the musk reactivates our instinctual drive to hump each other mercilessly. It’s my own personal modification, you see.”

Max looked both horrified and astonished as he unconsciously questioned why he had foolishly thought it was over and done with so quickly.

“A.D.A,” Col called out as he felt that familiar warmth blossom in his core, “Tell the crew we’re quarantined for...uh… the whole day.” He turned back to Max and held out a hand, “If you’d be so kind as to follow me Vicar, I think we should work this out of our system in safer conditions. Like my bed. Where my tools and rope are.” 

Max, still knelt on one knee, tossed the glass in the bin and took Col’s hand to gently kiss the middle knuckle, “We lead a dangerous life, Captain. Are you sure our bodies and souls will be able to withstand an entire day of...this?” 

Col yanked Max closer when he stood and pressed their chests together. He hummed softly as their lips met and he slowly started backing out of his lab, “I don’t care if you decimate me, atom by atom. You have my permission to fuck me until I’m destroyed, Max.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize if this chapter appears to rush through events. This week has been a little rough, and I lost every work in progress chapter I had written out. I'll try to keep the updates more consistent from here on but know if it takes a while I'm still trying. Thankyou for all of the kudos and comments, it keeps me going.

Sore didn’t even begin to cover everything Max was feeling the morning after. He bemoaned existence in its entirety while each aching joint and fresh bruise reminded him of his age. Max wasn’t getting any younger, and while the ‘raptidon incident’ would go down in memory as an exhilarating experience he was mildly certain he wasn’t eager to repeat it any time soon. Gradually, he was aware that his fitful sleep had been disturbed by loud bangs from below deck. 

“That’s right,” Max muttered to himself as he forced his legs to move despite their protests, “We have a crew.”

He stopped by Col’s door, testing the opening mechanism to discover it was locked, and pressed his ear to the cool metal. On the other side, he could hear the steady, log sawing snore of his Captain. Max rolled his eyes and proceeded to the air-lock entrance where he was greeted by the haggard faces of the rest of the Unreliables crew. They wordlessly dragged their feet as they passed him with the exception of Ellie.

“Took you two that long to clean up a chemical leak, huh?” She folded her arms and pursed her lips. 

“Chemical leak?” Max quickly sorted his thoughts, still half asleep, “Oh, yes. Of course. Forgive me, I’m still a little under the weather. We worked all day to ensure it was safely dealt with and I must have inhaled some of the fumes.”

“Sure,” Ellie didn’t buy it and pushed past him, “And I’m also sure that OSI would like to hear about your...relationship with an infamous dissident Captain wanted by the Board?”

Max blinked repeatedly and stuttered a response, “My relationship? It’s purely physical. You wouldn’t be able to prove anything. Also, what is this about the Captain being wanted?”

Ellie paused long enough to whip around and happily handed him a folded up wanted poster depicting Col’s likeness. She winked at him and left with her point having been made. 

Max stared at the poster, only half aware that he carefully took a seat on a crate nearby to better focus on the detailed charges written under his full name. When they met, what had only been months ago but now seemed an age, Col had been using an alias. Alex Hawthorne. Of course that was no longer the case as far as the crew was concerned. There was an unspoken rule that none of them were to acknowledge him by his real name in public spaces, but even in private the crew simply called him Captain. Max was the only one who used his name regularly. Even so, that was only when they were alone. He sat there now unsure of how this had happened, wondering if maybe he had slipped up and the wrong person overheard him or if one of the crew had sold Col out. Ellie was the most likely candidate, but surely even she wouldn’t stoop so low. 

“What the fuck do you mean it’s nine in the morning,” Colimgar’s gravelly, overused voice snapped Max out of his diminutive trance as he stomped down the stairs, “Actually, don’t answer that. Why did you drop the morning routine A.D.A.?” He passed by Max on his way to the bridge and subtly acknowledged him with a quick nod.

“Captain, I successfully completed the morning routine. You did not respond, so I assumed you were dead and proceeded to sit here contemplating why I exist,” The ship’s A.I. replied as if blandly reading off a planet side weather report. It worried Max somewhat just how aware she seemed sometimes, but as usual he pushed the thought to the back of his mind. He had bigger concerns. 

“You exist,” Col tapped away at a terminal connected to her internal settings, “To be the best version of yourself. Maybe some livelier music will do the trick. Gimme a test A.D.A.” 

The complete opposite of the Captain’s usual selection of Russian folk music gamboled through the ship, vibrating loose objects with the songs sonorous pitch. Max held back a barely restrained smirk under his austere expression as he heard the crew groan in unison.

“Excellent, thank you A.D.A. You can let em sleep now,” The pilot’s chair made a heavy whumpf sound as he reclined into it and sighed contentedly, “Remind the crew that I’m a prick. Check.” Col rotated the chair lazily towards Max and greeted him with a sleepy smile, “Sleep well, daragoi?” 

“Not as well as you, it seems,” Max’s mind wandered to yesterday’s events, questioning whether or not some of the exceedingly rough treatment had actually taken place judging solely on Col’s lackadaisical demeanor, “I managed to throw off your strict morning ritual, though, so that’s something.” 

The corner of Col’s mouth curled into wry smirk and he patted his thighs in a gesture for Max to sit in his lap. 

Max eyed him with a cynical gaze. He debated between his next course of action, disguising his misgivings about the wanted poster behind an apathetic front, and finally settled on accepting Col’s invitation. Before he took a step closer, Max quickly crumpled the paper in his fist and pocketed it, then crossed the room casually. 

“Come on, I won’t bite,” Col lured Max closer until he was within arms reach and enveloped him in his arms, “Hard.” His warm breath beat against Max’s neck as he readjusted in the seat. 

“You have got to be kidding me. I’ve just barely sat down and you’re already hard?” Max pretended to be inconvenienced by the rather obvious erection Colimgar had while simultaneously grinding into him, “Are you ever satisfied?”

Col hummed with his lips held to Max’s ear, “Must be the modified raptidon musk. Just a little more tinkering with the polynucleotides and I may have made a more cost efficient and effective alternative to that garbage Auntie Cleo pedals.” He buried his nose in Max’s hair and closed his eyes. His arms held Max strongly in place and radiated warmth. 

“So that’s what you were doing in that lab. What’s your plan? Destabilize the economy?” Max tried not to let it show, but the way Col was holding him made a pleasant shiver run along his spine. 

“We’ll have steady revenue. I have buyers lined up,” Col ran a wide palm along Max’s inner thigh, “Maybe I’ll take you out, buy you dinner?”

Max sat upright suddenly and twisted around to stare at Col in surprise, “Wait a moment. Are you asking me...on a date?!” His tone came off too incredulous and he backpedaled, “I mean, that’s not... “ He desperately searched his thoughts for some way of explaining to Col the complex feelings he had about ‘dating’, especially now of all times, when Col started to heartily laugh. 

“The look on your face,” He said through stifled breaths as he attempted to steady himself, “Oh my Law it’s like I told you a sprat was on your shoulder.” Col broke down into another bout of hoots and howls as Max stood up indignantly. 

Max called him a prick under his breath and folded his arms. In a small way, he was relieved he didn’t have to make that inevitable choice yet. He wasn’t ready, not by a long shot, to even entertain the thought that he may have feelings for his Captain. The very concept was just so outlandish to him and yet, he had felt that small flutter in his chest that told him everything he needed to know. 

“May I check my messages?” Max felt his muscles relax and the anger subside as Col willingly rolled out of the way. He caught a glimpse of Col’s thoughtful expression as he passed by and briefly pondered the idea that Col had been genuine and simply laughed to save face. That thought was quickly pushed aside as he read the words he’d been waiting to read ever since they had landed on Monarch. “Yes, finally! They found him.”

“Found who?” Colimgar reclined deeper into the chair and folded his hands behind his head.

“Of course you already forgot, you numbskull. Reginal Chaney, the scholar I’ve been searching for? We tracked him to Fallbrook but never found him? Well, I took it upon myself to use the last of my credits to pay an informant to notify me when Chaney was spotted.” Max felt alleviation pour over him as he turned to share his excitement, but he felt extinguished by the less than pleased look Col gave him. 

“Oh,” Was all Colimgar could say in the moment. He felt as though he was going to lose Max before he could even hope to convince him to stay. That feeling was etched in every line of his face and Max noticed. 

“Oh?” Max read Colimgar carefully and he bristled when an assumption came to mind, “You don’t sound very surprised.”

“No,” Colimgar chose to simply own up to it and come out clean, rather than drag it out any longer, “I’m not surprised. I knew your man was in Fallbrook, cause I met him.” He braced for impact. 

“You...what?!” Max’s voice instantly reached a furious crescendo, “You asshole...you fucking met him and didn’t fucking think for one Law-forsaken fucking moment that you should fucking tell me?! You bastard.” The only thing keeping Max where he stood was his disciplined restraint. Some years ago it would have been a different story. He wanted an explanation more than his hands itched to harm the first thing they could grasp. 

“Yea,” Colimgar tried to keep his tone level as his eyes refused to meet Max’s, “I had a drink with him. Nice fellow. Didn’t ask him any questions. We just talked tossball.” 

“I don’t fucking care about that! Why the fuck did you not tell me?” Max felt himself step forward as he lost his patience.

“I figured once you got you book translated you would leave and I…” Col trailed off and got a distant look in his eyes as though he was staring at something imperceptibly far away, “I didn’t want you to go just yet.” 

“You selfish fucking asshole. I can’t fucking believe you, of all the sulfur-sodden pieces of shit I’ve ever met, I-” Max clamped his jaw and squeezed his eyes shut as he reigned himself in and counted backwards from ten. His words stung Col, he could see that, but at the moment he felt righteous about it. Colimgar deserved worse as far as Max was concerned for withholding information.

“Take this piece of shit you call a ship to Fallbrook, now,” Max resentfully pointed to the nav terminal before he left fuming. 

\---

Somehow, when Max woke up the following morning, he felt even worse. His sleep had been restless and guilt-ridden. It felt like half of the time he was bickering with himself about whether or not he had been too harsh and the other half he seethed over what Col had done to him. By the time music rang through the speakers he realized he’d spent all night dwelling on his turmoil. 

Everything seemed to remain utterly normal as he joined the crew at the table, perhaps for the last time. If Reginald Chaney had the answers he was seeking, he thought bitterly, he had no reason to stay. 

Colimgar wordlessly set his plate down along with the others, made exactly how Max liked it. 

“Hey, uh Mr. Vicar,” Parvati spoke up after a moment, “Sorry to bother you. I didn’t get to ask yesterday on account I was so tired, caught what rotten sleep I could on the ground but there’s nothing quite as comfy as your own bed, er anyway. You seem a little out of sorts, I hope the chemical leak didn’t make you sick. If...if you like I got some bits, when we stop in Fallbrook I’ll see if I can get you something to help.” 

Her genuine concern exuded through every word and Max felt his shoulders release the tension they’d been holding, “Thankyou, Ms. Holcomb. That’s thoughtful. I’m fine, however.”

“Hey Max, while you’re talkin,” Felix butted in, absolutely vibrating with ecstatic energy, “Did you catch last night’s game? The Blackhole scored ten body-goals!” 

Max felt himself smile effortlessly at the welcome distraction, “No I didn’t. I have...business later today but I’ll meet with you to discuss the game once I’ve seen a rerun on the aetherwave.”

“Looking forward to it, Vicar,” Felix beamed, cleaned his plate and hustled over to Col, “Here, Captain. So remind me what I gotta do?”

“There’s a list there,” Colimgar nodded to the counter with his chin, “Take Ms. Holcomb. Ellie and Nyoka, will you stay occupied in the meantime?”

“Aye, aye Captain!” The two cheered in unison as they dumped their plates and headed off to wreak havoc. 

The silence that followed as Max and Col were the only crew left in the kitchen was suffocating. Max almost wished S.A.M. would make a sudden entrance like he usually did just to fill the dead air, but the aforementioned cleaning auto-mechanical spent more of his time on the bridge nowadays. Reluctantly, Max decided to speak up after choosing his words carefully. 

“Captain,” He glanced up to observe Col’s reaction, but Col barely even flinched, “Colimgar. I want to...I’m sorry for how I handled things last night. I shouldn’t have said those things and I-”

Colimgar walked towards the fridge and Max paused, briefly expecting Col turning to scream obscenities at him. Instead Colimgar remained utterly unmoved as he grabbed a cold beer and wrenched the cap off. 

“I was wondering if you would accompany me to meet the scholar,” Max felt increasing irritation as he assumed Colimgar was blatantly ignoring him.

“Sure, let’s go,” Colimgar downed the contents of the glass and set it next to the other empty one’s he’d drained previously. He casually left the kitchen and headed towards his room. Max looked at his half-eaten plate and pushed it away with a heavy sigh as he reluctantly followed. 

Col geared up for the trek mechanically, eyes constantly locked onto what he was doing as he moved in between checking his weapons and ammo. From his room he dutifully brushed past Max and stood waiting by the door. He had completely shut himself in and Max couldn’t see an easy way past his walls. 

Minutes later, Max involuntarily led them to the river and glanced back to see that even as they had no choice but to walk through the water Col’s expression remained like stone. He trudged through the knee deep, frigid flow and questioned whether this was really all that worth it. 

It then hit Max like a freighter what was really eating at him. He was a hypocrite. He’d been so upset with Colimgar that he’d almost willingly lapsed over the fact he had lied to Col at almost every turn since they had met. Now that it seemed inevitable that he would be discovered in his lie, Max hesitated. 

“Colimgar, can we speak about something serious?” He stopped where he stood and turned to face his fears. 

“I know what this means to you,” Colimgar was behaving more like himself before they had grown so close, and it almost felt as though Max had gone back to square one, “We’re finishing this. Come on.” 

Max sighed despondently and begrudgingly reconciled with himself that Col had to find out eventually and the situation was now out of his control. They were both liars, and this seemed inevitable.

Only around the bend, his calm mantra reminding him to resolve this peacefully completely shattered. He lost any patience he had remaining when he confronted Reginald Chaney and learned that he could not translate the book for him. Max saw red and violently lashed out, every ounce of built up frustration exploding from him in one brief moment. 

Before he could register Col’s arms wrapping around him he felt his feet leave the ground. His body hit the ground, knocking the wind out of him, and he looked around wildly for his surprise attacker. Col stood between him and Chaney wearing a scowl that could make a mantisaur flinch. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” 

Max attempted to stutter out a response but Col interrupted him, “What the hell is going on here? I thought this guy was a scholar?” 

\---

While previously Coligar’s demeanor had felt cold and indifferent, it now felt oppressively red hot with rage. He quickly left Max where he lay without receiving an answer, needing to be anywhere but there. 

Max felt the heavy weight of Col’s dissapointment strain on him. He dusted himself off, feeling lower than low, and even hearing Chaney mention a hermit on Scylla that could help him felt hollow. It didn’t matter when things between him and Col remained like this. He was trapped between desperately trying to conceive a way to make it right and go back to the way things had been and considering just simply leaving. 

He walked slowly in an attempt to give himself more time to wrap his head around things, but as he reached the Tipsy Sprat and heard the crews laughter he was just as lost as he had been. 

“Hey Vicar,” Felix waved him over with a grin, but his face fell when he saw the state Max was in, “Whoa. You okay?”

Max couldn’t see Colimgar anywhere and he wasn’t sure if he was glad about that or not. He listlessly sat with the others and poured himself a generous helping of the first alcoholic drink he could reach. “I’m fine,” He said tersely and drank with the aim of blacking out.

“Lemme guess, there’s trouble in paradise? Again?” Ellie laughed at her own dry sense of humor. 

“Shut the fuck up,” Max made no effort to disguise the disdain in his tone. He wanted to be left alone and chided himself for mindlessly sitting with the others in the first place. 

“Oof,” Nyoka raised her brows high on her forehead and looked at the others surreptitiously. She elbowed Ellie and shook her head when she noticed Ellie loading a comeback. 

“I wish you two wouldn’t fight like this, maybe if you just talked-” Parvati started but stifled herself when Max shot her an annoyed look. 

“I’m with Parvati. She’s right. You two-” Felix spoke up next and Max just about felt himself boil over. 

“I said shut the fuck up! There’s no ‘you two’ and never was,” He removed himself and resettled into a quiet corner of the bar to be left with his troubles. 

Parvati recoiled and folded her hands on her lap. She held back tears as Nyoka comforted her softly. Felix and Ellie shrugged and shook their heads. They all silently agreed to avoid Max. 

It seemed inescapable that Max wouldn’t be able to remain where he sat until he felt like leaving, but it wasn’t Colimgar who suddenly burst into the bar. Seven armed corporate security guards walked in, shattering the lively atmosphere. Patrons stared on in surprise as corporate presence was rarely seen at all on Monarch anymore. The apparent leader walked up to the bartender and shoved a poster in his face aggressively, “Have you seen this unemployed dissident?” 

Max saw the brief glimpse of Col’s likeness on the paper. His eyes darted to the crew and they nodded back at him. They had wordlessly understood what needed to be done next. 

“Gentlemen,” Max took initiative, getting into character and approaching the guards, “Is there some way I can help?”

The bartender gladly backed away as Max took their attention and ducked into the back. Of course he knew Col, almost everyone in the bar did, but many were not ready to sprat him out just yet. Not to some corporate goons.

“Good. A Vicar. Have you seen this criminal? Any information can be made as a donation to the church,” The officer held up the paper and Max feigned to study it closely. 

“By the Grand Architect,” Max paused for dramatic effect, hoping they would by his act, “Wanted for destruction of corporate property AND aiding and abetting the Board’s most wanted. Well, I would certainly recognize a face like that. I haven’t seen him hereabouts, but perhaps we can ask the patrons of this fine establishment.” 

He turned to the others and briefly relayed a look that stressed how they couldn’t mess this up. The guards reluctantly turned once again, facing the four of them.

“Ain’t seen him, and I been here a long time,” Nyoka said, her voice exuding disgust.

“Nope. Nu-uh.” Parvati kept her panic stricken eyes glued to the table.

“He kinda looks like an old tossball player...shoot what’s his name” Felix trailed off and tapped his chin in thought. 

“Ugliest son of a bitch I ever seen. Have you checked the raptidon pits? He’d blend in real easy,” Ellie calmly lit a cigarette. 

The guards looked amongst each other and shrugged as the officer slowly lowered the poster. He serenely folded it up and placed it in a pouch on his chest plate before posing a question no one had the answer for, “Are you interfering with a Board investigation?”

Max blinked rapidly, mentally tackling the shift in conversation as he had been mostly certain the others had been convincing enough. He half expected the men to simply leave, but could never imagine what happened next. 

The officer viciously snatched Max around the neck into a strangling choke hold and the other guards aimed their automatic weapons at the shocked congregation, “No one moves a fucking inch or I’ll execute this priest on suspicion of treason. Movement will be considered an admission of guilt, so you will be executed as well.” 

He dragged Max’s flailing body outside and threw him to the dirt, ordering him to stay down. Max felt his heart pound fearfully against his chest, threatening to flee his body at any second, as his mind panicked. 

Despite the man’s orders, a crowd of bystanders steadily surrounded the event, but he didn’t make anything of his prior promise and instead focused on Max. His men controlled the crowd, keeping them at a distance, as he leaned down to speak lowly to Max. “The wanted poster doesn’t say it, but I have reliable information that this criminal has been seen with a Vicar that fits your description. I could be wrong, of course, if you suddenly remembered where the dissident is?”

Max could taste dirt and blood in his mouth and swallowed it down with his dread, “Go fuck yourself.”

The man shifted and clapped Max in cuffs then pulled him to his knees. He produced a pistol and loudly announced to the crowd, “For withholding information and hindering the legal investigation of the whereabouts of a known and dangerous dissident I sentence this man to death.” 

Colimgar had quietly blended into the crowd after donning a helmet to obscure his face and watched helplessly as the events unfolded while he formed a plan. In the very last second he finally saw his opportunity and quickly acted. He shifted forward until he was close enough to pickpocket an identification card from one of the armed guards. Thinking on his feet, Col inserted the card into the Holographic Shroud the mad scientist, Phineas Welles, had given him. 

“Woah who the fuck are you?” He loudly shouted, stepping out from the stunned crowd and pointing at the guard he was imitating. 

“Who the fuck are you?” The guard looked him up and down, blatant confusion in his expression despite his face being hidden by a full helmet.

The officer turned to look at the commotion and was flabbergasted by the scene before him. “What the-”

“Sir, he took my gun!” Col took off his helmet, hoping his face didn’t look like his own, as he continued to point, “I don’t know how this motherfucker got his hands on official company property, but he just snuck up on me!”

Movement caught the officers eye and he turned to shout at four people hurriedly escaping towards the landing pad, “You four, sto-”

He whipped around again when he heard a loud crack and saw that his own man had knocked out this supposed imposter and retrieved his weapon, “I got him, sir!”

Max saw the others running towards the Unreliable and couldn’t ask for a better chance to evade the distracted guards as he got to his feet and bolted. 

Colimgar, still in disguise, ran after Max loudly shouting, “Don’t worry sir, I’ll get all five of them for you!” 

The officer could only stand stock still in bewilderment as the imposter began to stir and the other guards viciously questioned him. 

Max was able to reach the ramp and scuttled up and into safety without taking a single look back. He sat down on a crate and immediately started to pick the lock on the cuffs to free himself when he heard a jarring racket at the door.

“Get the fuck out, you sprat-fuck!” Felix came flying from the cargo bay and drop-kicked the invader squarely in the chest. 

Max felt his heart fall and rise like a rollercoaster as at first what he thought were guards following to finish him off quickly turned out to be Colimgar as he screamed at Felix, “It’s me! It’s me! Fuck! Get the fuck off, Felix.” He violently yanked the card out of his shroud and tossed it aside. 

Felix fell limp, releasing Col from the strangling grasp he had on him and looked at him with wide eyes. 

“A.D.A., get this ship off the ground now,” Col croaked and coughed as he stumbled towards the bridge to help the ship’s A.I. make take off faster. 

“Parvati, can you get to the engine room please,” He spoke into the intercom and waited for her to follow through, “We’re going to have to pull off a crazy Ivan to get away from these guys, can you do that?”

“Uh, Yes sir, Captain, sir. I think I can. I’m here, tell me when,” Parvati’s voice wavered with uncertainty. 

The ship rocked and groaned as A.D.A. cut corners to get the ship in the air before the corporate guards could, but even then they were cutting it close. Col supervised her systems until there was a brief interim as the chase started. He whipped around to find Max right where he expected him to be, waiting patiently behind him, and he pulled Max close with forceful brawn. Max buried his head in Col’s chest and tried his best not to let the tears pushing at the corners of his eyes to slip. 

“You okay?” Colimgar spoke softly as his hand stroked Max’s hair protectively. Max simply nodded and cleared his throat before letting go of Col and shakily uttering an, “I’m fine.”

“Strap in,” Col ordered over the intercom and Max immediately buckled himself in, “Parvati, you ready? These guys are hot on our tails and if they land a hit with those guns we won’t get another chance.”

“No pressure though, right?” She laughed nervously and was clearly shaking, “Okay Captain, ready.”

“Now,” Col braced himself as Parvati yanked out the power converter and shoved it back in. The ship’s engines briefly shut down, dropping the craft into a downward tail spin and by the time the engines came back on they were able to shoot past the pursuing gunship in the opposite direction. 

“A.D.A., skip us to these coordinates, now,” Colimgar rapidly typed in a series of numbers and barely kept his footing as the ships AI followed through with the order without question. It seemed apparent that she wanted out of this situation just as badly as he did. 

Now safely on the other side of the galaxy, floating just on the edge of a field of asteroids with Halcyon not too far away, Col relaxed his tense muscles and exhaled the breath he’d been holding. “Everyone alive?”

He could hear a round of confirmations and he smiled in relief. Col felt Max’s hand touch his shoulder and he turned to welcome him into his arms once again. They held each-other for a while, wordlessly apologising for earlier, and then Col kissed the top of Max’s head. 

“We have a lot to talk about,” He gave Max one final squeeze before turning back to his terminal, “Later, once we’re settled.” 

Max watched him type out more numbers and then looked at him. He considered just coming out with it now and atone for his mistakes, but he reconsidered and looked out the bridge window into open space, “I’m assuming we’re going to have to lay low for a while. What’s your plan?”

“Calling in a favor,” Col gave him a half-hearted smile.

An older man with wild hair appeared on the video feed looking rather bewildered, “This can’t be good, Colimgar, what kind of trouble did you get yourself into this time?”

“Nice to see you again too, Dr. Welles,” Col folded his arms over his chest and sighed, “I’m wanted by the Board, almost got caught in Fallbrook. Can me and my crew hide out with you temporarily?”

“Hmmm,” Dr. Welles stroked his chin in thought.

“No bootlickers or sycophants are on board,” Col derailed his train of thought. 

“Ugh,” Welles griped and threw his hands up in the air dramatically, “Fine, very well, but I’ll expect introductions. Come in, come in.” The screen went dark and gravity beams gently guided the ship towards a larger asteroid with an opening for a well hidden port. 

“So, this is the mad scientist that woke you up?” Max gave Col a look of concern. He didn’t trust that this was a good idea. 

Colimgar nodded and shrugged off his look. He walked off the bridge and met with the others in the cargo bay. Parvati was consoling Felix to the side as he had a crisis over nearly choking his Captain to death while Ellie and Nyoka stood waiting for Colimgar to explain. S.A.M. was present as well, but was too busy correcting items that had been shifted during the evasive maneuver. 

“Alright crew,” Colimgar folded his hands behind his back and continued, “We’re going to lay low with an acquaintance for a while. If any of you would prefer not to be seen with a wanted man, I’ll help you arrange for transport. Otherwise, consider this a shitty vacation.”

He looked around, but much to his surprise none of them immediately spoke, “Questions? Anyone wanna leave?”

Everyone either shook their heads or shrugged. 

“Well if it’s unanimous, when we land you’ll all probably be getting background checks, so be ready for that. Felix, get up. You couldn’t kill me if you tried,” Col noticed the ever so slight panic in Ellie but dropped it. He’d had enough surprise revelations for one day. He looked to his right at Max and subtly dropped his hands so that his pinky finger just barely brushed his leg. Max gave him a sideways glance and a calm smile as his hand lowered to touch his.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Note: Small retcon in this chapter. I couldn't help but head cannon Max having prison tattoos. I apologize for any confusion and tried not to make it a jarring change.)

“Dr. Welles, this is Vicar Maximillian DeSoto, who can’t read French,” Colimgar entertained himself with his trademark impish humor at the expense of his companions, “That’s Ms. Parvati Holcomb, whip smart mechanic and expert on the science of endearing social awkwardness. Mr. Felix Millstone, a dumbass but my dumbass. Ellie, who thinks she’s tough but I saw her cry during a romantic drama etherwave. Nyoka, alcoholic hunter extraordinaire with the best stories in the colony, and my S.A.M. unit. He’s having conjugal relations with my ships AI, A.D.A., but I don’t think he’s fully aware of that.”

His crew shot him exacerbated looks as always, he was unsurprisingly and tactlessly blunt with his descriptions. Colimgar held himself confidently front and center and smiled proudly while Phineas Welles nodded with approval as he looked at the new faces safely from behind bullet-proof glass. 

“Yes, indeed. You have gathered quite the motley crew of...unique individuals. I might like to speak to Parvati about my ship uh...perhaps later,” He turned his attention to Max, “I was surprised to hear on the solar winds that you had picked up a… priest in Edgewater. This must be him.” He eyed Max with subtle distaste. 

Phineas quickly segued, clapping his hands together, “Well, as for the rest of you, welcome to my home. You’re free to stay for exactly... let’s see.” He paused to glance at his wrist watch briefly, “Ah, yes, for one hundred and sixty eight hours, give or take a few minutes. Beyond that and you will be considered room-mates, which I am currently not seeking, so be mindful. Are we agreed?”

The Unreliable’s crew looked at each-other with puzzled expressions. 

“Very good, scamper off now. I would like to speak to your Captain privately with absolutely no eavesdropping. Oh, and don’t touch anything,” He gestured with his hands waving as though he were fanning them away. 

“I’ve hidden a stash of junk food and booze in a lockbox in the cargo bay. The code is 102377. Go enjoy yourselves, you’ve earned it,” Colimgar didn’t have to say much more to convince his crew to happily take off towards the ship. He gave Max a reassuring nod when he lingered momentarily. 

Half and hour passed sluggishly as Max anticipated Col’s arrival, sorting out exactly what he would say when they finally had the chance to speak while simultaneously supervising the crew. Felix and Parvati had found a veritable treasure trove of sweets along with another surprise, a lightly used big screen projecting etherwave. Before the beginning of their future sugar high, they set up a serviceable cinema in the cargo bay and settled on the most mindless movie they could find. 

Ellie and Nyoka had found mysterious bottles of clear liquid labeled with Col’s handwriting and were quickly too drunk to move from the seats they had taken. Max couldn’t help but appreciate Col’s subtle ingenuity for having a contingency for nearly every situation. He had to have planned this for weeks, brewing a reproduction of his Dedu’s vodka and then hiding treats to occupy or otherwise incapacitate the crew. It made him wonder what else he had prepared for. 

Max leaned forward from his chair to pilfer the half empty bottle from Ellie’s hand as she dozed with her head resting on Nyoka’s shoulder. He then leaned back and unenthusiastically watched the trashy drama Parvati and Felix’s eyes were glued onto. 

As expected, Colimgar’s version of home-made alcohol was much stronger than the original, but Max had no interest in using moderation after the first pleasantly burning swig. It was getting late, already past the hour he normally retired to his bunk, and he estimated that him and Col had plenty of time to talk about their petty fight later. 

Before long, Max could already feel the room swaying around him and his eyes held a blurred focus on one fixed point of the screen. He effortlessly chuckled each time Parvati and Felix laughed despite not hearing any of the one liners in the movie. His eyes kept closing on their own and each time he’d come back around to awareness he had sunk lower into the increasingly comfy chair. In an effort to stay awake long enough to see the end of the movie even though he had no idea what was going on, Max yet again swiped something from Ellie as she remained blacked out. 

He opened her mostly empty pack of Spacer’s Corona and ripped the filter off one cigarette before lighting it and inhaling deeply. Max hummed with delight. He hadn’t had a smoke in years and didn’t really missed it until now. 

“Nasty habit, for a priest,” Colimgar’s soft whisper made Max abruptly flinch. He chuckled low in his chest and pulled up a chair to be close, smoothly draping his arm over Max’s shoulders as he settled in. 

“Law, don’t sneak up like that. I’m still armed,” Max grumbled but still comfortably leaned into him and offered the rest of the bottle. 

Colimgar accepted the drink and took a generous dreg while his eyes remained locked on the movie, “Were the kids well behaved while I was gone?” 

Max’s heavy lidded eyes closed as Col’s knuckles lightly stroked his jaw and he murmured, “They’re fiends, but they’re our fiends.” He compelled himself to look at Col in the shifting ambient light of the projector and felt an undeniable swoon as he studied his features. Max was quick to blame it on the booze, having never known himself to ever swoon in his entire life, but there it was. His heart was fluttering. A stupid grin was plastered on his face. Just like a damn etherwave romance. He felt oddly content about the notion. 

“Bless this wretched hive of scum and villainy,” Col took another generous swig and looked down at Max, “Come on. I promised a talk.” 

He guided Max up the stairs and into the comfort of his room. It was utterly dark inside with the blast shields raised and, with no spectacular view to be had, Col instead switched on a string of lights just bright enough to dimly illuminate the surroundings with a warm glow. 

Max plopped onto the bed and briefly envisioned himself just falling asleep there and then, especially when Col joined him by his side, but he fought off the urge and remained as attentive as possible. His inebriated state made it difficult to focus clearly, but he still wanted to settle some things first. 

“Col, I’m so sorry,” He began, his voice wavering softly as he held nothing back, “I lied. I always lie. It’s just...who I am and I-”

His words trailed off as Col took his ankle and layed it across his lap. Max watched curiously as Col began unfastening the buckles on his boots. Col assured him he wasn’t up to anything sinister as he continued and Max waited patiently to see the outcome. He removed Max’s boots and set them aside before he instructed Max to put both his feet up. Max obliged, shifting into a more helpful position and within moments comfort washed away his meddlesome thoughts as Colimgar massaged his surprisingly aching feet. 

“Oh that’s nice,” Max truly believed he could doze off if he allowed it, but he held on by a thread out of sheer tenacity, “What did I do to earn this? Didn’t we establish that I’m an asshole hours ago?”

“I am too,” Colimgar glanced up at him with unreadable eyes, “If I had taken you to Chaney sooner your life wouldn’t have been in danger like it had been. You would have been safe. I did that to you, and now you’re a fugitive just like me.”

Max hadn’t thought about it like that. One detail, however, seemed off and made him question Col, “How would I have been safe?”

“You’d have asked me to take you to Scylla next, gotten your book translated, and then you could go anywhere you liked,” Col’s eyes fell to the floor and his hands stopped moving, “You’d have no reason to stay. Now...I’ve trapped you and tarnished your reputation with one selfish choice. I fucked up and I have no idea how to make it right.”

Max wasn’t sure what hurt more. Seeing how crushed Colimgar was by his own tortuous guilt or the mutilating realization Max had allowed Col to believe without a doubt that he would leave so freely after everything they had been through. He reflected on all the times he openly stated he had no strong attachment to Colimgar, and came to the painful conclusion that his deeply flawed self-denial had been poisoning what could grow to be something meaningful. Colimgar’s dedication and loyalty was in short supply, and Max had sorely taken it for granted. 

It was impossible to correct himself overnight, but he could start with a simple gesture. Max leaned forward and tugged on Col to draw him closer and bundle his torso in his arms. “You’re an idiot,” He said after a long, intensely intimate moment, “You realize that means you’re stuck with me, right? Not the other way around?” 

Col’s shoulders shook as he laughed into Max’s neck, his breath tantalisingly tickling his skin, and then he lifted his head to give him an inviting gaze, “I almost got you killed. This isn’t going how I expected it to go.”

“Get used to it. Now that the Board is hunting us, I’ll keep you on your toes. This isn’t my first time dodging the authorities,” Max twined his fingers through the leather strip that held Col’s grown out, shoulder length hair and he flung it aside. He buried his hand in the thick strands of wavy locks and pulled Col closer until their lips met. His tongue spilled the taste of honeyed liquor as it mingled with Col’s. 

Col sighed languidly and his hand began to roam leisurely up Max’s thigh. “You’re drunk,” He smirked as Max gently tugged his bottom lip in between his teeth. 

“Shut up,” Max wrenched the buckle of Col’s belt firmly, “Not drunk enough to know what I want.” 

Col sat up and simultaneously unfastened his belt while pouring a copious amount of his home-made booze down his open throat. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and rolled the bottle away across the floor before he gripped Max by the waist and reoriented their bodies so that he had full command. With Max’s thighs wrapped around his waist, Col captured his wrists in one hand and held them over his head while his other hand slowly flicked the snaps off of Max’s vestments. He leaned his head down just enough for their lips to graze together. 

Max lifted his chin to snare Col with supplicating lips, their tongues coiling together ardently. Col groaned as he grinded against Max and a fire lit in his core. He sat up once again and peeled off his shirt, pausing to give Max a look that he hoped would be enough to convey what was on his mind.

“That’s an interesting look you’re giving me, Captain,” Max pulled himself up and dragged his nails down Col’s back roughly as his mouth left a bruise on Col’s chest, “It’s cute how you think you’re the one calling the shots. That’s my role.” 

Col grunted and allowed him to finish speaking. He had other plans for Max tonight. 

Max felt his back hit the bed heavily as Col pushed him down with considerable strength. He gasped as Col took fistfuls of his undershirt and ripped it open as easily as shredding paper. Buttons flew in several directions and Max opened his mouth to protest the ruination of his only remaining fine shirt but Col stifled them with commanding kisses. His fingertips dug achingly into Max’s skin, dragging downward until they caught on his pants. Col tugged harshly, disrobing Max with bestial desire. 

“You know, for a man who talks big game about being a top,” Col hands worked like vice grips to squeeze Max’s hips as he reminded him who was in charge now, “You’re acting an awful lot like a bottom right now.” 

Max bit his lip to suppress the sounds clamoring for escape as Col exposed him, physically and otherwise, “S-stop talking.” He inhaled sharply as Col’s mouth descended to the crook where his leg and groin met and devoured the over-sensitive nerves endings there. A loud groan belted out of Max’s chest before he could cover his mouth with his palm. 

“Not this time, daragoi,” Colimgar stood up and yanked the rest of the clothing on Max off, then himself, “I’ve been wanting to do this for a while.” 

The bed creaked as his weight returned and he wedged his body in between Max’s thighs. 

“Now,” He rigid cock prodded at Max, “I can play nice... or not. Your choice.” 

Max glanced down and quickly calculated his odds. He’d only been in this spot a few times, a long time ago, and while Col wasn’t massive he was still decently sized. Enough that Max knew it was going to sting no matter how gentle he was. His eyes met Col’s and he felt his face grow hot as he struggled to think of an intelligent way to phrase his next few words, “I...I’m not used to uh...catching. I’ve mostly pitched.”

Col lips curled into a broad smile as he began to chuckle at Max’s euphemism. He understood perfectly well what Max was trying to say, but he feigned ignorance simply for the pleasure of listening to Max stumble over himself. 

“Stop laughing,” Max couldn’t see for himself, but he knew his face was redder than a mock-apple now, “Just...please go easy on me. Don’t...break me in half or anything.” 

Col folded Max up in his arms and pulled him into his lap, softly kissing him on the way up. He murmured something in Russian just as he lifted his fingers to his mouth to slick them before they traveled behind Max. 

His sighs were muffled as Col’s tongue slipped past his lips. He felt fingertips circle the precipice enticingly before abruptly sliding in. Max hadn’t felt such vulnerability in a long time.He winced and buried his face in Col’s neck as another thick digit was eventually added. Max detested himself for thoroughly enjoying being so willingly submissive. 

Somehow, despite himself, being here like this with Colimgar felt more right than anything he’d ever known, but it still slightly irked him. “Oh, fuck me…” He grumbled, more to himself than at Col. 

“Patience, daragoi, we’ll get there,” Col’s fingers moved slowly as he pressed his lips to Max’s ear, “I promise.” 

“That’s not what I meant-” Max protested but his words became dislocated and his voice trembled. The fingertips of Col’s unused hand had glided down his back mid sentence and took a handful of flesh on his rear, stretching it in a way that allowed Col to sink his fingers in to the third knuckle. 

Col whispered sweet nothings, half in a language Max could understand and half a medley of others, in Max’s ear as his fingers stroked deeply. Max felt his body twist involuntarily to be even closer to Col until their chests were pressed tightly together and he rested his head on Col’s shoulder. Max yearned to hear Col say that he loved him, even if it was just a beautiful lie. He wrapped his arms around Col’s torso, desperately trying to physically express something he couldn’t say. 

“I want you,” He shakily replaced one word for another as he left behind a trail of subdued kisses along Col’s collarbone. 

“Eager, are we?” Col smirked into the kiss he gave Max as he laid him on his back and readjusted. He pushed Max onto his side and laid down behind him, working his fingers dutifully to test the breach. “I might be able to fit now,” He put emphasis on the ‘might’ and waited for Max to get more comfy before he guided the tip of his cock towards the entrance. 

Max recoiled, mostly out of anticipation, and he quickly buried his face in Col’s pillow. The warm smell of Col’s hair and skin had a calming effect on Max and he allowed himself to relax as Col carefully split him down the middle. His arm automatically wrapped around to pull a fistful of Col’s downy soft hair as the lucious pain of taking Col’s cock sent pulsating surges through his nerve endings. 

“Oh...Law...Col...fuck…” His muffled cries were obscured by the pillow. He bit down on the cloth to keep from screaming as the last few inches Col had to give finally filled him. 

Col remained still inside him as one flat palm affectionately caressed Max’s side to soothe him, “We can stop if this is too much, daragoi. I won’t hurt you unless you want me to.” 

Max could feel himself throbbing around Col, achingly so, and he turned his head to see Col was looking down on him attentively, “No...please don’t stop. I want this.” 

Col’s fingertips danced along his skin until they reached his jaw line, stroking his stubble. He caught a stinging tear before it could fall from Max’s eye. There was an indecipherable earnest look in Col’s eyes just before he leaned down to connect with Max. Strangled moans spilled into their open mouths as Col’s hips moved haltingly back and forth. He started cautiously at first, pausing every moment Max winced, but soon enough their bodies synced up to a steady rhythm. Col’s hand transferred to cup the back of Max’s knee as he held his leg at an angle. 

Max’s head fell onto the pillow as his spine arched and the ebb and flow of pleasure racked him. He closed his eyes and allowed his appreciative groans to fly freely while Col pressed his lips to his neck. It felt as if nothing else mattered and even if at any moment now his body were to disintegrate atom by atom he wouldn’t care as long as Col was there. He buried his face in his arm, face burning hot, as he tried not to climax too soon. 

Col pulled out, jarringly, and laid on his back, “Come here, I wanna see how well you ride me.”

Blinking rapidly until he could process how suddenly the action had shifted, Max rolled over and dutifully stradled Col’s waist. In a small way, he was grateful for the change, and he wondered idly if Col knew he had been so close to the edge as well. He reached behind himself, stroking Col’s slick cock generously before guiding it back inside himself. 

Col’s hands rested on Max’s hips, kneading the flesh there with appreciation but not controlling Max’s movements. He moaned with his mouth closed and further sunk into the bed. 

“Is this your subtle way of saying you recant your earlier claim that I was acting like a bottom, because you seem pretty diminutive right now,” Max bobbed up and down methodically on Col’s cock. 

Col hummed deep in his chest and he smiled warmly at Max, “I just can’t get enough when you stroke your own ego like that.”

Max shuddered as Col’s throaty voice was gratifying to listen to, “I could make a joke with that...but it would be inappropriate coming from a man of the cloth.”

Col tried not to laugh, but he ended up choking it out and the wheezing sound came deep from his belly. It was infectious and Max laughed with him, practically collapsing onto Col’s chest in tears as the two of them lost control of themselves. The joke wasn’t particularly hilarious but the stress of the days earlier events had left their nerves frayed and all they needed was a decent laugh. Now, all of that fear and worry seemed far away. 

“A naughty priest and a meat popsicle walk into a saloon,” Col trailed off, leaving the punchline unsaid, as he inhaled the scent of Max’s hair lovingly. His hand idly scritched Max’s back as the two of them slowly got back on track. 

“You’re more of an...unplanned variable,” Max resituated himself, resting his weight on Col’s hips as he ran a hand through his hair to push back the errant strands laying across his damp forehead, “I’ve spent much of my life playing my role, and well might I add, but you seem to see straight through me. I’m still not sure how you managed to convince me to agree to… this arrangement, but I think I’m better for it.”

“A naughty priest and an unplanned variable start fucking-” Col laughed through Max’s fingers as Max clamped his hand down to playfully silence him. He bucked his hips against Max insistently, reminding him of their task. 

“You can be so single-minded sometimes,” Max murmured, only half serious, as he removed his hand and used it to reintroduce Col’s cock. He swiveled his hips until Col was fully engulfed and bit his lip as Col’s hands tugged his body down further. 

Col released his grip and allowed Max to set his own pace, switching his hands to mapping out Max’s thighs and chest. Max leaned back on his hands and the angle just about drove him mad as he began to enthusiastically ride Col’s cock. His head drooped back and soft moans spilled out like a waterfall. Col gripped Max’s cock in one hand and stroked in step with Max’s movements, while his other hand cupped Max’s ass for support. 

Max practically crooned Col’s name in between each raggid sigh. He felt his arms nearly give out as Col haltingly thrusted deeper and harder into him until it became too much and he collapsed. Col sat up and dutifully rearranged their bodies so that he could finish what they had started. Max grunted as his legs resisted bending as far as Col pushed them. Within moments, however, he was folded in half and crying out for Col to give him more. His palms rested flatly on the wall to keep himself from sliding under Col’s strength and it was the only thing about his actions that he had control over. Max’s legs bounced limply below the knee and his toes curled, his mouth hung open in a seemingly permanent ‘o’ shape as his eyes involuntarily rolled to the back of his head. 

“I’m...going to...ah-” His words were replaced with a series of expletives and loud, sonorous moans as Col skillfully fucked him senseless. Max’s final howl came with an eruption and a full body shudder just before he momentarily blacked out. 

He came to briefly afterwards, feeling utterly spent and well-used, and a small grunt pushed past his lips as Col crushed him with his full weight. 

“Fuck…” Col panted hotly against Max’s chest, trying to catch his breath before he moved another twitching muscle, “Have I ever mentioned...you’re a tight ass? Cause...if not, it has double meaning now.” 

Max playfully slapped Col’s arm and softly chuckled, “You’re an ass. Now get off me, I can’t breathe.” 

Col pulled away, trembling simultaneously with Max as his cock glided out, and he briefly pressed his forehead to Max’s as he hovered on hands and knees over Max. Their eyes met and there was something unspoken there, a moment that conveyed more than any words could ever hope to illustrate. Col kissed Max, longingly and as gently as the flutter of a butterfly's wings. 

After a lingering moment, Col rolled onto his back and sighed contentedly. He held his arm out of Max’s way as he curled up into Col’s side seeking a comfortable place to rest his head. Max settled his head in the crook of Col’s shoulder, closing his eyes once he was satisfied, “Should I be surprised we haven’t talked about our fight, still?”

Col draped his arm around Max while his other hand blindly patted the shelves over his bed for his pack of cigarettes, “We both got issues. We’re liars. I flirt with anything that moves and you cuss out total strangers for even lookin’ at you the wrong way. Pretty sure we came pre-packaged this way, just assholes, and that can’t be fixed just fucking it out. It’d be like trying to repair an engine by lubing up a crack and fingering it. Sure, the engine might like it, but it don’t fix anything.” 

Max couldn’t resist smiling at Col’s crass analogy, but the meaning still reached him and hit hard. Col was, as usual, infuriatingly right. 

“I don’t want you to change on anyone’s account but your own. You don’t owe me anything. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to say,” His fingers weaved through Max’s hair soothingly, “Nothing has to change, daragoi. It can just be me, you, and the unconventional way we keep resolving our differences.”

Max snorted loudly into Col’s chest and shook his head at his dubious statement, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say prolonged cryostasis left you a little touched in the head. I do owe you...a life-debt in fact.” He sat up to make eye contact as he continued, “You may have unwittingly engineered the events that happened in Fallbrook, that or it was inevitable the Board would come after you, but you still risked your life to save mine. I’ve never had anyone stick their neck out for me like that.”

Col finally managed to one-handedly retrieve a smoke and finished hanging it on his lip just before Max obliged him and lit it for him. “And now I’m stuck with you,” He muttered while smoke billowed from his mouth as he exhaled. He smiled drowsily at Max and smoothed his calloused hand over Max’s shoulder blade. 

Max took the cigarette and puffed on it before passing it back and laid back down as the smoke passed through his nostrils. “I suppose we’ll have to disguise ourselves from now on.” His mind centered on a concern that, if the officer’s words had been true, Max’s entire career might be over. He wouldn’t be able to rise in the ranks of the church as a wanted man. If he had been lying, Max was still not on the Board’s radar but that didn’t mean much when at any moment someone could identify him as an accomplice. Especially with how close he was with Colimgar. What Col had done to upset the Board, he wasn’t entirely sure. 

Perhaps it was just his mere existence, but he couldn’t imagine Col having done anything that earned a death sentence. He hid it well most of the time, but Max knew there was a good man under Col’s rugged facade that made it worth every awful thing Max had so far endured.

“I had a kinky idea,” Col, with his one track mind, tapped out his cigarette before he tugged Max snugly against him, “I could probably reverse engineer the holographic shroud Welles gave me and make you one. Be anyone we want, do some real dirty things to each-other.” 

Max couldn’t possibly roll his eyes any harder than he did then, but he still humored Col, “Who do you have in mind?”

Col grinned broadly, giving away his joke before he could even say it, “You recall that moon-headed guy on the Groundbreaker?”

“Fuck off,” Max pushed him playfully, “Next you’ll suggest one of the crew members.” 

“You could finally do whatever fucked up, degrading shit you’ve been wanting to do to Felix for a while,” Col teased and yelped in surprise when Max pounced on him energetically. 

“Why bother when I can ‘do whatever fucked up, degrading shit’ I want to you?” Max dragged his tongue hotly over Col’s neck, making him shiver as his erection instantly hardened against Max’s inner thigh. 

“You lick my neck again, I will fuck you. That’s a promise.” Col feigned a threatening tone, but as usual his crooked smirk gave him away. 

Max dared to repeat the action and top it off by gently grated his teeth on Col’s ear, “That’s why I did it in the first place, you dumbass.” 

Col arched his body into Max and passionately pulled him into a deep, lustful kiss, “You’re so fuckin’ sexy when you call me names, daragoi.” He rolled, forcing Max on his back, and pinned him down firmly. Max’s legs tightened around Col as they crudely reconnected. A wave crashed over him, drowning his senses out entirely as Col skipped several steps straight to hungrily taking Max. 

Max felt a loud, elongated cry peel away from him as Col stole his breath. He gasped for air in between powerful thrusts and scrambled to hold onto anything his fingers could grasp. His disjointed thoughts could only piece together a simple plea for Col to fuck him harder. Col obliged, but on one condition. He rolled Max onto his stomach and lifted his ass into the air until he supported his body on his knees. Max was all too happy to allow Col to position him however he wanted, and obediently parted his legs so that their bodies aligned. Col guided himself inside once again and leaned forward to pin Max down into his pillow by the nape of his neck. The loud slap of flesh mingled with their unrestrained moans as Col did a thorough job. He put every ounce of his feelings for Max into each thrust and didn’t stop until they were both shaking wrecks. Col came inside Max once again, filling him until it leaked out, just after Max shattered and collapsed into his own mess. 

Max desperately tried to catch his breath, realizing now as the fervent motion ended that he’d been holding it in involuntarily. His heart pounded wildly against his breast even after they laid there for a minute. “I’m...completely filthy now,” Max grumbled between jagged inhales. He rolled away and made a small noise of disgust as he realized just how much sweat and other fluids came away with him. 

“You ever seen a cream puff?” Col’s dazed mind couldn’t think of anything more degrading to say to Max as he propped himself up on one elbow, “You’re the prettiest one I ever seen.” He chuckled heartily as Max shook his head, both repulsed and humored by Col’s vulgar mouth.

“Grand fucking Architect, do you ever know when to shut up?” He got to his legs shakily, seeking out something to clean himself off with.

“That’s one of my finer qualities,” Col winked when Max shot him an annoyed look. He got up, just as unstable on his feet as Max, and struggled with the next thing he said more than he did putting on pants with his shaky hands, “We need a shower, I suppose, and maybe another drink or two. Then you can...stay here with me. If you want?” 

Max snorted, the question amused him with how absurd the notion was of him finding any rest in Col’s tiny, cum-soaked bed, and then he turned to look at the sincerity in Col’s eyes. They twinkled as Max begrudgingly buckled and said, “Of course, I’ll stay.” 

He approached Col just before they headed to the shower and tapped his chest with his finger, “One demand, however. New sheets. I refuse to sleep in a wet spot.” 

Col pulled him into an easy-going embrace, pressing his forehead to Max’s, “Daragoi, if you asked me to I would tap-dance naked in front of an Adrena-time addicted primal before you could say, ‘No wait, it’s gonna rip your dick off’.” 

Max laughed genuinely, shoulders shaking as he wheezed from being caught off guard. “You have an... eloquent way with words, Captain.” They walked together towards the shower, laughing the entire way.

\---

Max woke undisturbed for the first time in months, feeling rested and content. He could hear music playing quietly from a small hand radio on Col’s desk and his eyes slowly focused on the figure spread out on the floor. Colimgar had gotten up before him and was silently carrying out his morning routine. First thing in the morning was rigorous stretching. 

“I finally get to see your secret ritual,” He murmured drowsily and smiled, “You shouldn’t be able to bend that way, don’t you know how old you are?” 

Col returned his smile as he split his legs either direction and leaned to touch his toes on one side, “Discipline, daragoi. You would be just as flexible if you practiced.”

“I’ll pass,” Max bundled himself more snugly in the bed, “I’m not a psychopath who gets up at such a Law-forsaken hour to torture my joints like you.” 

“If you say so, pillow princess,” Col grinned as he teased Max.

“Sprat-fucker,” Max snapped back with an expression that mirrored Col’s. 

Col shook his head as he let Max have the last word. Watching him for a bit longer before sighing loudly, Max finally got up and joined him to see what it felt like doing things Col’s way for once. He readjusted the waistband of the borrowed sweatpants he wore then sat to face Col. 

Wordlessly instructing as he went, Col flattened the soles of his feet against Max’s and reached forward to clasp hands with him. Max groaned with strain as Col pulled him forward until his spine couldn’t go any farther, “How do you enjoy this enough to do it everyday? This is torment.” 

“It’s sort of a family tradition, my mama was a stickler for schedules and routines,” Col let Max have his turn and laid flat on his own legs. 

“Is that so? You know, you haven’t said much about your past or your family. I’m curious to know, what were they like?” Max tried again, but he just wasn’t reaching as far as Col could. 

“Wanna get to know me deeper than surface level, huh? Why don’t we talk about them stick n’ poke prison tattoos you got first, priest.” Col switched to a face down position and pushed his torso up with his arms until his spine curved backwards. Max followed suit. 

“You’ve never seemed to notice or care about them before. There’s nothing to say. I got them so long ago it feels like a past life,” Max deflected the question with a grunt as his back popped. He flopped onto his stomach and simply watched Col for a few moments, “And yes, maybe I do want to understand you better, is that a crime?”

Col laid on his back next to Max and laid his arms to each side, “Not much to understand, daragoi. My old man was born in Chelyabinsk and my mama was born in Seoul. We grew up moving around, mostly staying in Russia, to follow their jobs. Both brilliant scientists and workaholics. Endellia popped out when I was ten and that’s about it.”

“Did they come with you and your sister on the Hope?” Max leaned on his elbow and watched the subtle shift in Col’s expression occur. He knew the answer before Col spoke and felt guilty for asking something that clearly stung him.

“Nah,” He maintained a stiff upper lip and tried to act like it was behind him, “How many sit-ups do you think you can do?” 

Max stubbornly resigned to himself that if he backed out now Col would certainly tease him relentlessly, and he couldn’t have that. 

\---

Later in the day, after lunchtime, Col busied himself refitting the ship with a few new amenities gifted to him from Dr. Welles. He had Felix help him replace the entire shower system for one that didn’t belch frozen water, and a deep bathtub as well. Afterwards, they installed see-through display screens in each room that became an instant favorite among the crew. 

Col monitored the success of his effort after he announced the surprise and smiled as everyone fiddled with the numerous audible landscapes to choose from. They could now look out their window and see anything from a forest during an evening rainstorm or rolling grasslands on a sunny day. He stopped at Felix’s room to thank him for helping with the work.

“Is this what Earth looks like?” He stared wide-eyed at a snow-capped mountain surrounded by a twinkling lake of clear blue water. 

“Parts of it,” Col remembered the first time he brought Felix planet side. It hadn’t occurred to him until that moment that Felix had grown up on the Groundbreaker. He had no concept of sky or wind or rivers. Seeing his pure, childlike fascination with even the smallest shift in the weather warmed the cockles of Col’s heart. 

He moved on to the next room to check on the others, stopping next with Parvati. “Ms. Holcomb, what do you think?”

She had a similarly wholesome reaction to it, having chosen a field of purple, pink, and yellow flowers, “It’s awful pretty, Captain. Thank you.” She turned her head and smiled at him warmly, “I’m gonna tell Junlei about these, she’d like them.” 

“Thank Dr. Welles, they’re his invention,” Col turned and strolled to Nyoka’s room. 

She reclined leisurely on her bed with the sound of rain realistically trickling down her darkened window, “I could get used to this. Having a working shower is nice too.” Ellie sat in her room with her, and for once had nothing clever to say in response. 

He left the two of them to finally meet Max where he left him in his private quarters. The room was bathed in the dancing light of an underwater scene. It truly felt like the Unreliable had been submerged just below the churning surface of a vast ocean. Col looked out and could see nothing but endless blue and the murky depths below. It had an oddly comforting effect. He turned to see Max spread out over his bed, smoking a cigarette. 

“This should keep them occupied for a while,” He crawled into bed with Max and took the smoke. 

“Well done, Captain,” Max lifted his legs so that he could drape them over Col’s lap. “I’m sure these lavish gifts have nothing to do with Dr. Welles making an attempt to divert attention away from himself. He seems like the outgoing type, doesn’t he? It would be a shame if we all just sat here for a week and didn’t bother him at all, wouldn’t it?”

Col squeezed his thigh and exhaled smoke, “I give it another hour. They’ll be scratching up the walls like trapped sprats before the week is out.” 

Max didn’t seem at all perturbed by the notion, “And what about you?”

“Worry about me when I’m dead, cause then you’re in charge,” Col passed the cigarette back and closed his eyes. He was fully prepared to spend the rest of his day right where he sat.

Max extinguished the cigarette and eyed Col’s hand, briefly feeling the urge to reach out and hold it before he folded his restless hands behind his head. They sat together for a peaceful few minutes, silently enjoying the sound of waves crashing on a distant, unseen shore. 

Then someone screamed.

“Here we go,” Col groaned angrily and got up to go resolve the issue.


End file.
